Page 63 of The Jester

“He and his family have spent centuries perfecting how to keep us under control. What happened with Kayan? That’s nothing compared to what he’s done to others. What he did to Finn, that was a second warning. That was to let us know we are still his.” She shrugs, a small sigh biting her lips. “And we will be his forever.”

I breathe out hard, rubbing my hands, rubbing my palms over my face. My hair is tied back and suddenly it feels too tight, too restrained, so I pull it loose and shake it over my shoulders.

“I saw something in Eldrion’s chambers,” I speak quietly, almost hoping that Briony won’t hear me.

But this time, she turns towards me, and her eyebrows quirk with interest. “What did you see?” she asks.

I shake my head. Shame scratches beneath my skin. “I walked in on him...”

I cast my eyes down towards Briony’s pelvis in the hopes she might understand what I’m trying to say. “Saw him... walked... I walked in on him. He was naked. There was a huge, shimmering image in the middle of the room, an image of me and him together.” I hesitate. “Fucking. And he was...”

Briony’s eyes widen. “What did it look like?”

I blush as the image of me and Eldrion reappears in my mind.

“I mean, was it cast in the air? Was it in a pool of water?”

“It was in the air. It appeared like a window or picture, just shimmering there in front of him.”

“Did he say anything before it appeared?”

I shake my head. “I didn’t even know it was possible to do that, to create visions and...”

Briony bites her lip thoughtfully.

“What is it?”

When she looks back at me, she reaches for my hand and squeezes it tightly. “You mustn’t feel guilty,” she says.

“You don’t know the worst bit.” I lace my fingers together and squeeze tightly, my knuckles whitening with the pressure. “I liked it... No, I didn’t like it, but it made me feel...”

The blush intensifies and my mouth goes dry. I can’t believe I’m saying this out loud, but I need to say it to someone.

“While Kayan was dying, that’s what I was doing.” Finally, the shame gives way to heartbreak, and my voice cracks because I start to cry again.

Briony squeezes my elbow, then walks towards a small bramble of bushes nearby. When she returns, she’s holding a rose. Picking off the thorns, she puts it into my hand and tells me to inhale the scent slowly. I do what she says and immediately begin to feel calmer.

But when I open my eyes and look at the petals, I don’t see pale, delicate pink. I see ice. A memory barrels into me so unexpectedly that I can barely stay standing, but I try to push through it. Try to find the happiness because I know it’s there somewhere.

I feel my lips part into a smile.

“Better?” Briony asks.

I nod and tell her the story of Kayan and me by the lake. The day he showed me how he learned to control his powers and create ice from water.

“It wasn’t long before . . .” I hesitate.

“The accident,” Briony finishes.

I nod, brushing my fingers across the rose petals. “Before that, we used to meet at the lake all the time. It was our place. We would skip stones, and he was always so angry that I was better at it than him. That night, the night with the rose, he cheated. He used his powers to help it skip all the way to the other side. And he thought he was so clever and so funny.” I start to laugh.

Briony smiles too, then she moves away from me slightly, looks down towards her feet, and stoops to pick up two pebbles. “It must be hard not having a body,” she says. “At least I’ve been able to say goodbye to Henrik properly.”

I nod, tears pricking my eyes again.

“So, let’s say something for him now.” She passes me one of the pebbles. “Let’s skip some stones and share some memories of Kayan and say goodbye. And then maybe you’ll feel stronger.”

I rub my thumb over the pebble. Gratitude swells in my chest. “Thank you,” I say.

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