Page 32 of Look on the Bright Side

“Please don’t give up,” he wept. “Please.”

On impulse, Lark put her arms around him and hugged him close. Was that against protocol? She didn’t know. Didn’t care that much, either. “I bet she was an amazing mom for you to love her so much,” she whispered.

He clutched her hard, a desperately sad man on a terrible day, and she felt his whole body shake.

“Be a good son now,” she said, “and let her go.”

His grip tightened, and she felt him sob. Then he straightened and looked at her, and she gave a little nod.

“Okay,” he whispered, wiping his eyes. “Okay. They can stop.” His mouth worked, and then his face was suddenly calmer and so, so sad.

“Stop compressions,” Lark said, taking his hand.

They all looked at the monitor, which showed a flatline. Mrs.Almeida’s face was gray underneath the mask.

“Call it, Dr.Smith,” Dr.Unger said.

“Time of death, seven thirty-four a.m.” She squeezed the son’s hand. “Why don’t we go down the hall for a minute?” she suggested. “They’ll tidy her up and you can see her again. Okay?”

“Okay,” he said, his voice shaking, and she took his hand and led him to the family quiet room and sat with him as he wept.

Yes, his mother had been old and frail and her mind and personality had been eaten away by dementia. But she was his mother, and he’d never spent a day of his life without her in this world. That was absolutely worth crying about.

When Dr.Unger came in, the son was talking to someone on his phone, crying softly as he detailed what had just happened. Howard squeezed Lark’s arm. “Nice work in there,” Dr.Unger said quietly. “The kindness, I mean.”

Lark wiped her eyes. “Well. Thank you.”

“You’re a human golden retriever, Dr.Smith. You make people feel calm and special.”

She huffed a laugh. “That may be the nicest thing anyone’s said to me.”

“There’s generally a moment when you kids go from being residents to being doctors,” he said. “Was that today for you?”

She tilted her head. “Um…I don’t think so. I think today was just my golden retriever moment.”

“Well, it’ll come. You won’t have to ask yourself when it does.” He smiled. “Hey. Give Heather and Theo my best, okay? Heather, um…posted about today.”

Her throat clamped shut, and an awful thought came to her. The Big Lie of her and Lorenzo had already spread through the hospital. What if…

“Dr.Unger,” she said, swallowing, “you might have heard something about…um, my personal life recently.”

“That you’re dating Lorenzo Santini?”

Crap. “Yeah. It’s very, um, casual and new and I’d rather not tell Theo and Heather anything until there’s actually something to tell.”

He looked away from his screen. “Got it.” He paused. “Can’t say I’d put you and Santini together, but maybe it’s a beauty and the beast thing. Good luck all around.” He smiled and turned back to his computer.

•••

Napping had proved elusive. She thought about going to Addie’s or stopping by the bookstore to see Harlow and Grandpop, but she wanted to be alone, too. So she got her bike from beneath the deck where she kept it and rang the little bell on the handlebars. Joy would still be sleeping, but Connery had a doggy door. Sure enough, he came flying through the yard and jumped up against her legs. “Want to take a spin, handsome?” she asked, scooping him up and putting him in the basket.

A nice long ride on the bike trail, a cute dog for company. She headed west, needing to fill the hours of the day. Down past Blue Willow Bakery, past Maurice’s Campground, already full of RVs and tents, past the spot in Eastham that smelled like roasting coffee, courtesy of Beanstock Roasters. The sun was warm, and the bike path was filled with other bicyclists, walkers, runners and rollerbladers. On autopilot, Lark smiled and said hello to every single one.

She was grateful for the life she had, for her family, for her health. But she was sad, too. Seven years ago, Justin had died, the only boy she’d ever loved, and for seven years, she hadn’t been able to shake this feeling that she was a ghost, too. Not really here. On the days when reality broke through, it felt like she was walking across a partially frozen pond, and every step had to be careful and deliberate, because if she thought too much about the icy water below, she’d fall straight in and drown.

She got off the bike path near Bridge Road and pedaled her way past the lovely old homes and bursting gardens to Boat Meadow, the prettiest bayside beach in Eastham. She had never come here with Justin. It was one of the best things about the place. No memories of the two of them here, nope. She sat on the warm sand and watched her little dog snuffle and run for the next hour or so. “Cute dog,” someone would say, and she’d answer “Thanks!” That was about all she had room for today.

But she had to get back, of course. Took a shower, changed, kissed Connery’s little head and then said “Go home!” and watched as he streaked over to the big house. Texted Joy that he was on his way.

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