Page 117 of Look on the Bright Side

“I can’t believe they were making us play bingo when this game was out there,” Etsie said. “I laughed so hard last time, I wet myself.”

“It happens to the best of us,” Joy said. “Meredith? Want to stay?”

Meredith did not. Oh, well.

As Joy drove home that night, she was aware of an unfamiliar feeling sitting in her chest. What was the word? Kind of like satisfied or after you had a good meal…

Fulfillment. Yes. She hadn’t been shopping in days. Not even online, and for her, that was a record. Her last chemical peel had been months ago, and while she knew she could ask Lark for a Botox session, she always seemed to forget these days.

She didn’t dread being home anymore. She loved home now, loved having Ellie there, though that wasn’t guaranteed to go on forever. But for now, she and Ellie took turns cooking. Joy! Cooking food!

“If you can read, you can cook,” Ellie had said. “It doesn’t have to be fancy, but I’m not eating takeout every other night. Too much salt.”

Sometimes Lark came over, too, though her hours didn’t give her much time. She was also doing some volunteer work with dying people, something Joy was going to start, too, as part of her job. But whenever Lark did come, the three of them had so much fun. At least once a week, another one of Ellie’s daughters would join them, too, “just to hang out with you and Mom.” It was wonderful, like a sorority, Joy imagined. Like having nieces.

“I think you and Lark saved me,” she said that evening as she and Ellie were eating arugula salad with beets and pecans (not Joy’s favorite dinner—too healthy—but there was macaroni and cheese in the fridge for later). “I’ve been so lost, and then I got Lark, and then you, Ellie, and now I have a job I love! I can hardly believe it.”

They were sitting on chaise longues on the deck, Joy in a silk caftan with matching wrap, Ellie in jeans and a T-shirt that read Blackbeard’s Bait and Tackle. They couldn’t be more different, Joy thought.

Ellie took a sip of rosé and said, “I don’t know about that. I think you saved yourself. You started by being kind and generous and giving Lark an affordable place to live, and let me tell you, there’s not much out here. Then you gave me a place to stay at the worst moment of my life. And now you’re brightening up the lives of the residents at Bayview. I think what you’re seeing is that you’re happiest when you’re helping someone else.” She glanced at Joy and smiled. “What do you think about that?”

Joy blinked. “I…I never thought I had much to offer.”

“Well, you were wrong. Think about it. When you married Abdul, you were doing it for Paulie and him, so they could be together. You said that was a happy time. And not just because of the money, Joy. Because you helped them be together. This is a happy time because you’re sharing your home with two people who needed it. You’re the one who’s saving people.”

Joy’s throat tightened. “I never thought of it that way.”

“Well, get thinking of it that way, missy.”

“I will.” She pushed some leaves around on her plate. “How are you doing, Ellie? What’s on your mind lately about Gerald?”

She sighed. “Mostly, I feel sad, you know? I trusted him a thousand percent up until this. I’ll never get to do that again. I can forgive him, I think, because he did end it. It wasn’t like he stopped because he was caught. But we’ll never be the same.”

“Do you have to be? It’s like a chip in the windshield, but the windshield hasn’t shattered. It still works.”

“You’re right.” She stared out at the ocean, the sky darkening bit by bit. “I can’t stay here forever.”

“Well, you could.” Joy finished her wine and poured a little more. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“What’s it like, being married to someone who really loves you? Someone you love just as much?” Because with three and a half husbands, Joy had never experienced that. Frankie had loved her, but it wasn’t mutual. Carl had used her, George had abused her and Abdul…well, he had used her, too, even if she signed up for it.

Ellie stared at the horizon. “Oh, it’s…it’s home,” she said with a little shrug. “You feel so safe and accepted and adored. Even if you just let out a huge burp or haven’t showered in three days. You look into each other’s eyes and you just…click into place. You can relax completely and know that just by waking up, you made someone’s day.”

“That sounds nice,” Joy said wistfully.

“It is. It’s so nice. And I do miss it. And him.” She looked at Joy. “Did you know that being here is the closest thing to a vacation I’ve ever had? Being somewhere different, somewhere lovely…Gerald and I never got to do that. Too many kids, too little time, not enough money. It’s been so restful, even though I came here when I was angry and upset and sad.” She reached over and squeezed Joy’s forearm. “Thank you, Joy. You’re a wonderful friend.”

“Stay as long as you want,” Joy said. “You’re a great friend, too. The best friend I’ve ever had, other than my brother.”

They sat there, sipping wine, watching the sun sink into the ocean. The orange and purple clouds lit up, deepened in color, then faded, and still they sat. Two middle-aged women, sitting on a deck, living in the moment. And this moment was perfect.

•••

“I want you to marry me, Joy,” Gary said the next day, cornering her in the library.

They’d finished a rousing hour of karaoke, and Joy was now unpacking a box of books, adding some spicier stuff to the boring old classics they currently had. She’d spent the morning at Open Book, getting recommendations from Destiny, who was always good for a chat (and had an enviable wardrobe). “Make me the happiest man alive.”

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