Page 100 of A Taste Of Darkness

All my life people treated me like I was nothing.

I was my sister’s spare. I was the unwanted child. I was the naïve one, someone to push around.

For too long, I allowed everyone to hurt me without getting mad. I always accepted it without a reason.

I wasn’t one to hold grudges, and I knew I’d forgive Milo because people made mistakes. It wasn’t in my nature to hate someone, especially those whom I loved. I always gave a second chance.

But this time… I needed a good reason why he deserved one. I needed to know that he wouldn’t do this again, that it was an honest mistake. I needed to know that he meant to do the right thing, that he really thought leaving without saying a word was the right thing to do, and why he thought that.

I needed one good reason that proved I wasn’t just someone he could have for a while and then throw away. I’d been that person for too long.

“Please,” I begged, “name one reason why you couldn’t have told me.”

What if he died? He would’ve left me without a goodbye. He didn’t even know how much he meant to me, had no clue how far I would’ve gone for him.

“I can understand why you didn’t want me there, but Milo…” I sighed heavily, trying to stop my tears. “Why couldn’t you at least tell me about your plan?”

His eyes closed, and I believed he finally grasped how wrong he was for not doing it. “Because I was afraid that you’d do something stupid if you knew.”

“Like storm the place?”

“Like try to keep me from leaving,” he said.

“We could’ve talked about it.” I crossed my arms. “You could’ve explained it to me, told me that you had to do this. Then you should’ve explained to me why I couldn’t, under any circumstances, come save you. I’m pretty confident in my gun-using skills.” A hint of a smile pulled on my lips. “I can almost aim.”

“Tell me you would’ve listened.”

I looked away, muttering no under my breath. “I need another, better reason.”

Milo stepped closer to me; I didn’t step back. And I didn’t pull away when his hands cradled my face again or avoid looking at him when he stared into my soul.

“If I told you and you tried to stop me, I would’ve stayed here with you. And if you asked to come with me, I would’ve said yes, knowing it would’ve killed us. I’m incapable of denying you anything, cuore mio,” he spoke. His voice was steady, confident. He meant every single word. “You could ask me to start a war, and you best believe I’d have an entire army ready in less than five minutes.”

His thumbs brushed over my skin, wiping tears away. “And you’re right. I didn’t sacrifice shit because of you or even for you. I did it because I need you to be okay. I need you alive and safe. And it’s not fair that everything got twisted and you somehow ended up in the middle of it all.” Milo brushed a strand of my hair out of my face. “You were never the problem, Sterlie, my family is.”

The heaviness in my chest lifted with every word, having decided that it was good enough of a reason to earn my forgiveness.

I liked being at peace more than I wanted to hold a grudge.

“I could’ve scared your family,” I said. “I’m pretty horrible at math, I’m sure that would’ve scared them off."

He smiled softly, then leaned down to rest his forehead against mine. “You want to test it out?”

“Not anymore.” My arms snuck around his torso, forcing him closer to me. “I’m sure they’d only find it scary now because they’re afraid you’d kill them if they thought it was lame.”

“Probably,” he laughed. “But, if it makes you feel better, I almost cry every time I see you try to solve a math problem.”

50

POSITIVITY

Milo Marucci

“So, this is where you grew up?” Sterlie looked around my old bedroom, carefully inspecting every inch.

I fully planned on getting it remodeled or clearing out an entire wing of the property and reserving it for just Sterlie and me. That was if she still wanted to move here with me.

It was clear that I had no other choice but to stay, but Sterlie could still change her mind. Before she decided to live here indefinitely, I wanted her to see the place. Now that I was in charge, she was way out of danger.

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