Page 54 of Lost In Someone

We stand under the huge rainfall showerhead. As the hot water pounds down on us, I wash him, letting my hands roam over his chest and arms, the muscles tight and sinewy from manual work and all the surfing. He doesn’t have my muscle build, but he’s probably as strong as me. He massages shampoo through my hair, a look of determination on his face as he keeps the bubbles out of my eyes.

The thought hits me of what I want next for us. I want to marry him. I want us to have more children. To fill this house with love and joy.

“Merrick thinks we should turn the other barn into a hospitality venue to host weddings and parties. It’s incredibly lucrative and wouldn’t cause us much work. Apparently, wedding planners are a huge thing now, and they are responsible for all the furnishings, caterers, etc. We just provide the venue. What do you think?”

Ivan tips my head back to rinse the shampoo. “Really?” he says after a couple of minutes. “A wedding venue? I’m not sure, babe. I don’t think I want all that going on all year round. It would be a lot of noise, and Milo could get unsettled by it.”

“That’s what I thought too, but we decide when to take bookings. We could do two or three a year if we wanted. Or more, if it didn’t bother us. It’s the farthest barn from the house, and you can’t even see it. Let me show you the figures I worked out, and then we can make a decision. It doesn’t have to be now. We could leave it for a couple of years until Milo is older.”

“Okay, show me tomorrow.” He kisses me thoroughly, and any other thoughts float down the drain with all the bubbles.

“What time are we picking up Milo?” I ask Ivan as we finish breakfast. “As much as last night was amazing and what we needed, I’ve missed him.”

“Me too, and whenever we’re ready. I’ve called Mum, and she says she’s fine, and he’s been as good as gold.” Ivan looks past me to the window. “That’s Stacey’s car. What’s she doing here?”

“Maybe something happened to Drew.” I stand quickly.

We’re at the door before she’s even got out of the car.

“Hey, Stacey. What’s up? Is Drew okay?” Ivan asks.

“What? No, Drew’s fine, as far as I know. Ivan, I came to see you.”

I step aside to let her in. “Do you want a coffee or a cup of tea?”

“Tea would be lovely.”

Whatever she wants to talk to him about is not good. “Spill the beans, Stace.” Ivan clears the plates off the table and offers her a chair.

She sits and takes a breath. “I just want to give you the heads up that Kate’s house is going up for sale.”

Dread fills me. I don’t want her anywhere near Milo. “Have you seen her?”

Ivan’s gone still.

Stacey chews her lip and drums her fingers on the table. “No, I saw her husband.”

“Her what?” I look at Ivan, who sits with his mouth open. “Did you know she was married?” Has he failed to fill me in one important piece of his past with her?

“No! Christ, of course not. And if I had, I would’ve told you. You know that.” He looks stunned by her revelation. “I thought the house belonged to her parents. How can she sell it?”

“Apparently, her parents signed it over to her as a wedding gift. They got married in June. I’m so sorry, Ivan.”

June, fucking June. Did she wait for Ivan to take Milo before she got married? Is this why she didn’t want him? Because her new husband didn’t want someone else’s child? They probably have done a DNA test before he was born, so he knew he wasn’t the father. Fuck, I feel sick.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about. She’s nothing to me. She chose to abandon her child and promised to stay away from us. As long as she keeps away, she can do whatever the hell she wants.” Ivan sounds so hurt and angry. When I rest my hand on his shoulder, he settles a little and reaches up to clasp it. “I’m sorry, Stace. Thank you for telling me. Hopefully, the house will sell quickly, and we can close the whole shitty episode.”

“It will. We’ve got a waiting list of people wanting to buy it. I bet it will be gone within the week.” She looks at her watch. “I’d better go. I didn’t want you to find out any other way, Ivan.”

“You don’t want your tea?” I ask.

“No, thanks.” She stands and gives Ivan a sweet, sad smile. “You’re worth a hundred of her, Ivan. She didn’t deserve you then, and she doesn’t deserve a moment of your time thinking of her now. I’ll see myself out.”

“Thanks, Stacey. We’ll see you soon.”

Once the front door has closed behind Stacey, Ivan drops his head down onto his folded arms on the table. I pull up a chair and sit close to him. “That’s why she wouldn’t keep him. Milo wasn’t his.” His voice is quiet but firm.

I’m not surprised he came to the same conclusion as me. “Yeah, it looks that way. Maybe that’s why her parents wouldn’t have him because she wouldn’t be able to stay away from them forever. And seeing Milo grow up is against her wishes. Or maybe her husband’s.”

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