Page 34 of Crown of Chaos

Knox had tried to distract me by talking, but eventually, I’d stopped replying to the things he was asking. After that, he’d offered me soft, soothing purrs, but the tone of them was still off as he fought through his own emotions.

Esme continued uttering encouragement in my ear while Brander talked Soraya through what was occurring between my thighs. Hushed voices filled the room, but the moment I started screaming again, they all paused.

“Aria, you need to push on the next one,” Brander urged, peering at what Soraya and Siobhan pushed my thighs apart to show him. He frowned before sliding his eyes to Knox, who sat frozen in place with a haunted expression.

“I am pushing,” I whispered weakly, collapsing back against Esme once the pain ebbed. It no longer really went wholly away.

“Drink,” Esme ordered, adjusting me so she could pick up the blood. I let my head fall away from what she offered. My silent refusal was punctuated by my eyelids finally sliding closed. I couldn’t do this.

“You’re weak as fuck, Aria.” Knox chuckled coldly from beside me. My head turned, and I glared at him through watery eyes. “You crave to know why I don’t want you to have my children. Because you’re not fucking strong enough to carry them,” he continued shattering me even more. “Look at you. You’re weak and pathetic. You’re not a fighter, after all, are you? You are not worthy of carrying my children.”

I turned away from him, swallowing the sob—or, at least, trying to. It slipped from my lips, filling the otherwise quiet room. The silence and tension grew as the collective anger replaced the air in the library. The girls stared at him with death promised in their glares. Soraya opened her mouth to speak, but Lore beat her to it.

“That’s screwed up, Knox,” Lore hissed. “What in the hell are you thinking? She’s fucking trying, and you want to pop off with that? Come on, this isn’t the time or place for that, brother.”

“For once, I agree with Lore. This is not the ideal time for you to be a massive dick, asshole. You don’t fucking do that when a woman is giving birth. Especially when you’re the womb-raider, prick,” Killian snapped, but Knox merely snorted his reply.

“Why not? Aria’s too fucking weak to give birth. She can’t even manage to do the one fucking thing she was literally created to do. Isn’t that right? Your entire purpose is to create life, and that’s not working out so well for you right now. You’re a fucking disappointment, wife. What the fuck did Lennox think when he chose you as our mate?”

I snarled, fully intending to find the strength to tear his head from his neck, but another wash of pain stole the breath from my lungs. Grabbing behind my knees, I pushed as a scream of anguish and rage ripped from my throat, and that was followed by a broken keening noise that echoed through the room. I continued pushing until the look on Soraya’s face made me hesitate. She reached down, peering up at me with wide, rounded eyes.

“Don’t pull on it, Soraya,” Brander warned urgently. “Push, Aria. The babe is coming, and it needs your help right now,” he demanded.

“Fuck you!” I sobbed but did as he’d asked. I cried out, gritting my teeth as I glared at Knox. His expression was one of pride instead of disappointment.

“Come on, Aria, let’s finish this. I know you can,” he whispered, his eyes searching mine as I cried, pushing harder. He didn’t look away from me, never taking back the strength he lent me as I felt the babe leave my body.

I looked to Soraya and then Brander as they studied the tiny creature I’d created. I struggled to sit up, but Esme held me tighter. When Soraya shook her head at my expectant look, a fresh sob shredded my throat while tears rolled down her cheeks.

“I want to see!” I demanded, clinging to my denial even as grief threatened to swallow me whole. “Please let me look at her,” I begged through deep, heart-wrenching cries that shook my whole body.

“Cut the cord and hand the babe to Siobhan. The next babe is coming,” he continued as if my heart weren’t sitting in Soraya’s arms, soundless and still.

“Let me see her, Siobhan. I want to see my baby!” I continued relentlessly, needing to see the babe more than I needed to breathe.

“Aria, focus on me,” Knox stated. “Just breathe. Just breathe for me, please.”

The pressure started again, and I sobbed. I was exhausted, and my heart was shattering into a million pieces with every second that passed without a sound from my daughter. Siobhan’s eyes pleaded with me, but I already knew the truth. My child was dead, and the next one would be as well.

Grabbing my knees, I bore down again, screaming as the pain intensified. The moment it let up, I leaned back, staring at Knox, who watched Siobhan rocking the babe with a look of raw, unadulterated pain on his face. The next contraction tore through me, and I groaned through my teeth as I brought the next out of my body.

Esme released me, and I sat up as Soraya grasped the babe. I took it from her. A watery smile that felt like betrayal tugged on my lips as I cradled the small, red, wrinkled body. It was only a fraction of a moment before my heart shattered and a sob escaped my lungs and filled the silent room. Siobhan placed the other beside me, and I cried harder while taking in their perfect faces.

“Sons?” Knox asked in a thick tone laced with emotions, but I didn’t have time to answer.

“Daughters,” Soraya whispered. “Twin girls.”

“No, please,” I begged, rubbing their chests as if I could will them awake. “No, this isn’t happening. Please wake up,” I prayed as I bawled brokenly. “I need you to wake up for me.” My body rocked, and I could barely draw enough breath. It was so unfair that my heart beat while there’s didn’t. “Oh God, please don’t do this. Wake up, babies.”

“Aria isn’t done yet,” Brander stated softly.

“She is for the moment,” Esme snapped, leaning over to push the hair away from my face as I tried to bring the babies back. “Aria, they’re gone.”

“No!No, they can’t be. I want my children. I wantthem!”

“They’re already gone. They didn’t suffer, and I assure you, your daughters aren’t in pain right now. I know you’re hurting—trust me, I know. But they’re beyond pain, and even though it feels like your universe is crumbling, you’re going to be okay,” she murmured through the tears running down her cheeks. “Eventually, you’ll be okay again.”

“This is my fault,” I whispered, stroking a trembling finger over the promise of darker blonde hair on her head. Leaning closer, I kissed one and then the other before wiping away the white coating from their faces. They were tiny, but my fingertips against their hands felt right. “I did this to them because I trusted the wrong person to do the right thing.” I curled around them, staring at their tiny bodies.

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