Page 32 of The Warrior's Captive

She didn’t want to imagine Castor doing the same thing again.

“I think it might be for the same reason that you couldn’t stay with the pack even though your home was always your sanctuary. It turned into a prison for you, and you had to get away. That’s why you begged Kieran to let you come here. You needed a fresh start.”

The toast tasted like ash in her mouth, but she forced herself to swallow. Who ate rye bread and enjoyed it anyway? Rome hadn’t lost his taste for bitter things. He still drank his coffee so strong that tar was pretty much an understatement.

“That doesn’t make any sense. He doesn’t need a fresh start from me.”

“If he’s free and unharmed, then I’m thinking he’s trying to figure out a way that he can live his life with you in it—or if he’s not, then maybe he’s figuring out how to extricate himself from that situation without causing an all-out war. Either way, do you think he’d make a good mate while you’re at home looking after a family and he’s out blowing some guy’s brains out to earn a living?”

Rome’s bluntness nearly made her throw up again. She set the toast down and smoothed back her hair from her face. “That’s disgusting. He doesn’t know that I’m pregnant.”

“No, but a smart man knows that most mates want children and if he sees you as his mate then he’ll want to figure out a way to be worthy of you.”

“He’s already worthy of me.” Her tone carried enough ice to chill the entire room.

She sounded like she had when she’d told Kieran that he owed it to her to let her go to Rome’s. The peace he’d devised to save their pack felt like it was going to kill her. He’d put the happiness of many ahead of her, and while it seemed like a small sacrifice and she understood it, her lifeblood had been spilling out all over the place. Metaphorically or not, she felt like if she’d stayed in her tiny little cabin any longer, it would be the end of her. She’d needed to leave, to get away, to put the broken pieces of herself back together.

“He might not see it that way.” Rome slid her plate closer to her and got in her face. The brother she used to know had zero emotional intelligence. He never would have done something like take her hand and press his thumb into the center just hard enough to get her to feel something. “He didn’t make you any promises, Briar May. You have to remember that. I don’t think he was in a position to feel like he could. We’ve all been denied our mates because the good of the pack comes before any individual. I didn’t even ask our parents about Lila because I knew Dad would have said no, because she wasn’t from one of the neighboring packs. Kieran was denied Zora for years as well. He missed the first decade of his children’s lives. That was the price he had to pay for what our father thought was the good of the pack. Dad knew that change was needed, but he knew it had to come at a pace that the pack would accept—too much too soon and he would face challenge, and the next alpha might not have been so understanding.” Rome paused, and Briar May thought once more about how much her oldest brother had changed in only a few short months. Before all this, he would charge headfirst into any situation and maim first, then ask questions later. She hated that he’d had to go through such trauma to finally be free to feel.

And she hated to think that this was the road that a warrior like Castor would have to walk. “Look, Kieran knows what it’s like to have to make tough decisions. He also knows when to fight. We all have our regrets, and I know he’s sorry that it had to happen this way, with you getting hurt.”

“I’m not mad at Kieran,” she snapped.

“Yes, you are.”

“Whatever. I’ll get over it. I’m not just going to get over Castor.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I can’t do anything about it. It’s not like I can drive down to Arizona and find him. I just wish I knew he was safe.”

“Do you wish you could tell him that in a few months you’re going to have his child? What if there’s more than one baby?”

“Then I’ll go back to the pack and leave you in peace. Mom and everyone else will help me.”

“That’s not what I meant. You don’t have to leave. I wouldn’t have let you come if I didn’t want you here in the first place. I just think that a man has a right to know if he’s going to be a father. You could ask Kieran to contact his alpha.”

“Kieran has no idea that I’m pregnant. No one does. When I told them everything, I left out the obvious bits about us. They’ll assume the worst without hearing me out. Castor is hardened and more experienced, especially in comparison to me. Do you think they’re going to believe that I wanted him, and was the instigator in a situation that leads to getting in this condition now? Half the males in the pack are likely to go down to Arizona to start that war Kieran tried to prevent in the first place, and he’d probably be leading them.”

“There isn’t going to be a war over you being pregnant.”

“No?” She raised a brow, daring him to challenge her. “Because I’m not a first daughter? Because I’m not important enough for one?”

Rome made a motion like he was trying to get her to sit down and cool off. “Because Kieran has a good head on his shoulders. He diffused what I did, and Castor’s pack is full of bastards, as far we can tell, and every single one of them was hellbent on revenge.”

She shivered at the cold, brutal picture Castor had painted of his pack. She would never allow her children to be raised the way he and his brother had been. She knew she didn’t know the worst of it by far. “Even if Kieran contacted Castor’s alpha to let him know he was going to be a father, then that could cause repercussions. I know his pack aren’t like the Rangers, but you know yourself—” She stopped herself before the words came. Rome knew exactly what could happen to a shifter who had transgressed pack laws, especially if Castor’s pack had laws about taking mates. She placed her hand on her brother’s arm, “Or what if telling him only endangers me and the baby? What if he left willingly because he didn’t want anything to ever be traced back to me or end up harming me? Anything he did, I mean.”

“I think that’s a decision you’ll have to make. I’ll support you either way. We all will.”

“Saying all this wise shit kind of creeps me out, Rome, honestly. I’m glad that you’re… that you’re trying to be okay. I’m so glad that you’ve let Waverly into your home and that she’s worked some kind of miracle on your heart, even if you won’t admit to it. I was so worried you’d never find any sort of love again, and being banished from the pack, you had no one. The guys at the garage seem like family when you talk about them. It’s good that even in the city, there are wolves that come together and make a sort of pack and look out for each other.”

Rome brought the conversation right around back to her. “I know you don’t know what to think right now. It’s okay to take your time.”

“What if taking my time means that Castor runs out of it? What if he didn’t want to leave, but he did it to keep me and my pack safe? He might not seem like it, but he’s the type that would lay down his life for what he believed in and the people he loved. He’s a hard man and he’s not going to show what he thinks or feels. He’d do what he sees as his duty.”

“Whatever you decide, it’s going to be obvious to everyone soon enough unless you stay here and stay hidden. I don’t think you want to travel the same road I have. Don’t wall yourself off from the people who love you. If you’re worried that Castor is out of time and you don’t trust his pack, then tell Kieran to get word to his alpha. He could demand Castor back because he dishonored you in order to keep the peace. That’s the kinds of demands that heartless bastards take heed of—that and cold, hard cash.”

She tried to drink some of the water, but it felt so forced going down that she almost choked on it. “And then what?” she rasped.

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