Page 73 of Follows with Intent

When silence fell again between them, Nico rubbed his eyes. Then he lay still again, staring out at Jadon, through him. When he spoke, his voice had become syrupy again. “I’m going to drop out of grad school.”

Jadon tried to say nothing. Then it slipped out of him: “Nico.”

“I am. My mom’s been after me for years to come back home. She wants me to be in a telenovela—do you know what that is?”

Jadon nodded.

“So, maybe I’ll do that. My brother does some directing. It could be a family thing.”

Jadon’s head throbbed. He tried to find a more comfortable position in the chair.

“What?” Nico’s voice sharpened.

“Okay.”

“What does that mean? You don’t approve?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“No, you didn’t say anything.”

“What do you want me to say? It’s not my life.”

“So, you don’t approve.”

“Like I said, it’s not my life.”

Instead of whatever Jadon was expecting—shouting was at the top of the list—Nico started to cry. Little tears only, but a steady stream of them. He turned into the pillow again and held himself still. Finally, he lifted his face. It was wet, the tear tracks glistening the color of salt. “I think I want to go to sleep now.”

Maybe it was the late night. Maybe it was the way Jadon’s bones felt hollowed out by exhaustion and fear and adrenaline. He wrapped his hands around the arms of the chair to steady them. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I don’t want you to go to Argentina. I don’t want you to go back to Wahredua. I want you to stay here. And I know that’s not realistic. I know how hard you’ve worked for the career you have. I know you need to move and start the best doctoral program you can get into. And I want that for you.” His voice started to unravel. “But how am I supposed to sit here and listen to you tell me how you’re going to throw it all away because, what, you realized you’re a human being, and you’re complicated, and maybe you want more than one thing at the same time? I mean, Jesus Christ, Nico, that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’re gorgeous; of course you’re going to enjoy the fact that people like how attractive you are. Of course you should be proud that you’ve done modeling work. That doesn’t change anything about your work, about how smart you are, about the insights you’re bringing to the scholarship.” He tried to stop there, but the rest burst out of him. “I mean, a telenovela?”

Nico stared at him, his dark eyes wide. Then, slowly, a huge smile cracked his face.

“Oh my God,” Jadon said under his breath.

Covering his smile, Nico continued to stare at him.

“I’m sorry,” Jadon said. “It’s been a long night, and—” He started to rise. “I’m sorry. I’ll go.”

Nico caught his wrist. His grip was surprisingly strong. For what felt like a long time, they were chained together like that, Nico still trying to cover that stupid smile. Slowly, Jadon sank back down into his seat.

“I’m sorry,” he said again.

Nico shook his head. “No, you’re right. I’m embarrassed, that’s all. It’s—it’s so superficial. So vain. I mean, according to all my ex-boyfriends and TikTok, I might need validation. Scratch that, I definitely need validation. But I don’t like that about myself. And I don’t like…I don’t like how it makes me act.”

“Believe it or not,” Jadon said drily, “there’s a middle ground between dressing like a suburban dad and blowing your professor for a publication credit.”

“Jadon Reck!”

Jadon shrugged.

“Come over here.”

“Uh, pass.”

“That was the bitchiest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“I—”

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