Page 97 of Knot My Sin

It’s going to be so nice to barbecue out here and hang out.

Taking a cleansing breath at the idyllic scenery, I remind myself that our alphas are sorry. They’re doing all of this to make amends.

“Flynn?” Shaw yells out, making me curse under my breath.

“Are you okay? Why are you so mad?” Everest yells.

Rolling my eyes, I shove the collar in my pocket. I guess I’ll have to explain myself. Great, at least I feel calmer.

“I’m fine,” I call up to them, jogging across the house and up the stairs to talk to them. The walk up to the third floor goes faster than I’m ready for it to end. My alphas don’t deserve for me to lose my shit at them for their past mistakes.

“Hey, I was feeling some pretty intense emotions,” Everest says, watching me carefully from where he’s waiting for me outside of Wren’s nest. I love that they’re across from each other.

I don’t want to assume anything when it comes to her. Going forward, we’ll even sync our heats together. It’s absurd how excited I am about that, but so much depends on if she ever feels comfortable enough for that. “Woah, Flynn. What’s going on?”

I don’t want to invade her nest with my negative emotions, so I take a deep breath.

“Can you give the paint to Shaw, please?” I ask instead, thrusting it at him. Everest gives me a concerned look, but takes it from me and goes into the room to give it to him. They both walk back out together, but I figured they would.

“Talk,” Shaw growls, his eyes pinched. There’s no alpha bark, though, so I close my eyes and force myself to take another breath. Fuck me, here goes the spiral.

Blinking hard, I sigh as a tear escapes from my eye. They both look terrified, because it’s so out of the blue.

“I found this in the basement,” I say, shoving my hand in my pocket and pulling out the offending leather to show them. Everest hisses as he sees it, and Shaw curses.

“Damn. I feel like an asshole for not wondering where that went sooner,” Everest mutters. “I’m really sorry you found that. I hate that I was so uncaring the day we brought her home from the auction. Wren felt like a liability, a burden we didn’t know what to do with.”

“I didn’t ask,” I tell him, my voice cracking. “I was so distracted by Shaw’s dick, I didn’t think to ask where Wren was. This was all of our faults, and I think it just hit me. We don’t deserve her.”

“Flynn,” Shaw grunts, shaking his head as he swallows hard. “I don’t think it’s about deserving her. It’s more about how we’re destined for each other. Deserving her comes with working to be better men, better alphas for her.”

“Wren’s like no one else,” Everest says softly, his face full of vulnerability I rarely see. I know it’s there, he just hides it really well behind his good natured smiles. There’s a killer behind it just as easily as the man who craves to be loved.

“I never know where I stand with her. When I think she’s going to tell me to take a flying leap off a cliff, she’s pulling me closer to her,” he admits. “The day she asked for my bite was a complete surprise to me. I was one of the worst offenders when it came to pushing her away, yet she let me in.”

“Ambrose is the last one, but I think that’s his choice,” Shaw says with a sigh. “What did he say exactly about it, Everest?”

Everest’s lips twitch, but not because it’s funny. More so, Amb is just really damn smart and slightly manipulative. They all love control.

“He said he wanted to bond her during her heat or not at all, because it’ll mean that she finally accepts her place with us,” Everest explains. “Wren didn’t know what to say. I know she doesn’t want to have a heat after her awful experience, but I’m hoping she changes her mind. Amb is willing to wait for it to happen.”

“That’s really sweet of him, even if it’s manipulative,” I mutter. “Everything just feels upside down right now, and I’m having a hard time. I think it really hit me how fucked up her introduction to our home was. It makes sense now why she was so damn scared of you guys.”

“Her experience with alphas has left a lot to be desired,” Shaw grunts. “Her brother is looking for where Trey lives and working on the leads, but the alpha is a ghost. No digital footprint, nothing.”

“What if… someone takes her from us one day?” I rasp. The idea is so horrifying to me, I can’t fucking breathe. Bending over, I gasp, clawing at my throat. God, I hate having panic attacks.

Dammit.

“Flynn, breathe,” Shaw barks, with power behind his words.

I can feel my airways opening by his force of will alone, and I feel cool, blessed air coming in. Gasping greedily, I still feel the panic clawing at me and my heart rate racing. I don’t mind his alpha bark, it doesn’t bother me at all, because I need him to help me when my emotions and anxiety are riding me.

“Okay, but hear me out,” I insist, tears starting to flow as I brace my hands on my thighs. “There’s no way to find Wren if someone like Mark took her. We’d never find her, and I don’t think I would be able to survive that. I couldn’t…”

Everest bursts into action, pulling me into a tight hug. “I get what you’re saying,” he says, kissing my temple. “What do you want to do about it?”

“Is it too awful to suggest finding a way to trace her movements somehow? I’d suggest a tag in her shoe, but fuck, what if someone takes them from her?” I cry out.