Page 106 of Knot My Only Fan

“I feel it.” He sighs, pulling at the tie that isn’t snug against his shirt. “I feel like I can’t breathe.”

“Do you need an ambulance?” Slight panic laces my tone. I don’t particularly like my father, but I don’t wish for his demise, either.

He shakes his head and pulls the tie off, throwing it on his desk. “I felt your pain, Lucas.” He blinks hard as he blows out a breath. “Seeing you the other night brought it all back to me.”

“Brought what back?”

“The feeling I’ve tried to forget. The longing for an omega who is yours.”

My heart aches with conflicting emotions as thoughts of Grace flood my mind. Memories of her heat bring a smile to my face, but they are quickly overshadowed by the hurt I feel at her choosing Stanton.

I try to push her out of my mind, but she remains like a constant thorn in my side.

My father pushes away from his desk and walks to the window. “I told you I tried to forget I had a fated mate out there. That I did it for your mother’s sake. For my children’s sake.” He turns and paces the room, like a lion going crazy in a small cage. “But I couldn’t have you go through the same thing.”

“What are you saying?”

“I promise you I didn’t know that Grace didn’t have a clue about the night of her heat.”

Anger burns inside me when I hiss, “Why the hell didn’t you call me to let me know? Forewarn me.”

“Because I’ve had a terrible time of my own.”

He shakes his head before he scrapes his hand over the rough stubble on his chin.

“What happened?”

“I found my fated mate.” He turns and gazes out at the New York sprawling cityscape. Letting his thoughts mix with the sounds of honking cars.

“You did,” I whisper.

He pushes his hands in his pocket as his shoulders sag. “And I don’t know what to do.”

“Do you want her?” I ask. “Did she smell you?”

He turns and looks at me. “I’m not sure.”

“Then how do you know she’s a scent match?”

His gaze wanders around the spacious office, taking in the oval conference table where he holds important meetings. The pictures of former presidents, his idols, on the walls.

“Because there has never been a perfume that has had me prepared to give all this up for an omega ever before.”

He settles into his oversized leather chair and rests his hands on the smooth surface of the dark oak desk in front of him.

“Are you trying to tell me there’s a decent alpha underneath that hard shell?”

He shrugs his shoulders and taps his shirt where his heart beats underneath. “I don’t know if there is anything good under here. And that’s the reason I think I should stay away from her.”

I remember back to when my father told me he knew he had a scented mate. But that was so long ago. “It was twenty-one years ago. Are you sure it was her?”

“It never goes away, Lucas. Never...” He scrapes his fingers through his gray temples. “You have to fight for Grace or you’ll be in pain for the rest of your life.”

“Bitter and twisted like you, you mean?”

He drops his gaze to the floor. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry for being a terrible father.”

“Maybe this scent match will make you a better man… a better alpha.”

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