Page 4 of Killing Emma

I take a deep breath, tip my glass back, and down the rest of the wine. “I don’t wanna do this. We’ve been back and forth for months.”

“I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you.”

Sobs threaten to explode in my chest, but I choke them down. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what? Apologize?” He’s sounding more and more desperate as tears slip down his cheeks. “I should’ve been there for you when you were going through all the treatments…I should’ve—”

“You should’ve stayed out of Melanie’s fucking pants!” I throw the wine glass in his direction, and it shatters into a million pieces on the sidewalk.

Jared jumps to the side, his eyes wide and his hands up in surrender. “How much have you had to drink tonight, Em?”

I shake my head and feel like there should be tears streaming down my face, but there aren’t any. “I haven’t had much.”

He raises a brow, eyeing me. “What’s not much? Four glasses?”

“No,” I snap. I don’t know how many glasses I’ve had. “Just go home.”

“This is home, Emma. Home is with you, and I was stupid. I didn’t even realize it until it was too late, and I had fucked everything up. Please.”

I stare at him, trying to process his words. That’s the problem with this—he’s said them all. All the good ones. All the ones that a woman wants to hear. He said them to me. I think he meant them. But I don’t feel it anymore.

It’s me.

“Go.” I take a step back, no longer flirting with the threshold.

“Emma…” Jared makes a move to come toward me, his face torn apart with heartache.

“I can’t resurrect us from the dead, Jared.” With that, I shut the door, the automatic lock clicking into place. He wouldn’t come in, anyway. He’s not that kind of guy. He won’t push my physical boundaries.

He’ll just go sleep with his employee instead.

“Asshole,” I mutter under my breath as I make my way back to the kitchen. I hear his Porsche outside, revving up and tearing down the driveway. Jared’s never had a temper. I’m not sure he’s ever yelled at me.

My eyes hang on the bottle of wine, resting there on the counter. It’s over halfway gone, and I don’t need to drink anymore. I really don’t. It’s not a good habit, but the last few days have been rough since the anniversary of my mom…

That brings tears to my eyes. I squeeze them shut. She’s been gone for almost three years now, and it still feels like yesterday—even more so when shit hit the fan with Jared. Lydia, my best friend, is always there for me, but it’s not the same. She doesn’t know what to say the way my mom always did.

“Fuck,” I whisper, batting away the tears. I grab the bottle of wine and pick it up. With no hesitation, I pour it down the drain of my kitchen sink, watching it disappear. Sure, there’s more in the wine cellar, but I’m too tired to go down there.

Maybe I should call Lydia.

I pat the pockets of my jean shorts, expecting to feel my phone there, but they’re empty. Ugh. My bare feet pad across the tile, and I make my way to the staircase off the main hallway. However, as I exit the kitchen, a warm gush of air tickles my arms.

Whipping my head around, I catch sight of an open window in my living room. My shoulders slump, and I head over to it, shutting it. More than likely, I left it open last night in a state of booze ridden stupor.

Yeah, no more wine.

I flip the locks on the window and head back for the stairs, my footsteps thudding on the carpeted treads. I really should have them redone, but that would require reaching out to a contractor and overseeing them as they come and go from my house. The thought sounds overwhelming. I don’t want visitors.

Once on the second floor, I make my way down the hallway to the second master bedroom. I haven’t been staying in the main master bedroom since I kicked Jared out. I step inside and spot my phone on my bed. I pick it up and plop down on the edge, seeing that I missed a call from my lawyer. I hit the call back button, and he answers on the first ring.

“Hey, Emma.”

“Hi, Kyle.”

“I was just calling to update you and let you know I contacted Jared’s attorney and—”

“And he still hasn’t signed. I know.”

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