Page 69 of Knot Her Reality

Evangeline

After dinner, as promised, I make my way into the basement where Finnegan’s office is located. As soon as my feet hit the floor, I turn my gaze to the gym. I’m really going to need to start hitting it up at least a few days a week. It’s been over two weeks since I set foot there.

Shaking my head, I turn to Finnegan’s door and knock lightly.

“Come on in, Evangeline,” his voice calls, and I push open the door.

Finnegan sits behind his desk, writing something on his tablet before lifting his eyes to me. “Look at you remembering to come down and see me.”

“Of course, Dr. Abernathy. I can follow directions from time to time.” I bite back a laugh when Finnegan winces. “What’s wrong? Don’t like your name?”

“I don’t understand why you seem to get such joy over calling me Dr. Abernathy when you know how much I hate it.” He shakes his head with a laugh. “There’s a reason I don’t work in corporate America.”

Snickering, I move to sit in the chair across from his desk. “Because Bree gave you a job.”

“No, brat. Even before Bree offered me a job, I already had my own practice that I operated out of my house. I’m not some boring, stuffy doctor who wants to put on airs, and that’s exactly what it sounds like when you call me Dr. Abernathy.”

Shrugging, I pull my legs into the chair to get more comfortable. “Maybe if you didn’t react so badly to it every time, I wouldn’t keep doing it. Have you ever thought about that?”

He makes a face. “Of course I did, but I can’t seem to help myself. Much like you when it comes to giving me a hard time. But that’s not what we’re here to talk about, is it? We’re here to check in and see how you’re handling everything. A lot has happened over the last two weeks. I need to know how you’re handling it all.”

I know telling him I’m fine won’t do me any good—even if I am fine. I also know that if I answer him right away, without thinking about it, he’ll call me on my bullshit. That’s what makes me both love and dread having these appointments with him. Running a hand over my face, I take the time to think about how I am feeling about it all.

“It’s been a lot—you’re right about that. Every single meeting or date has been…different than I expected. That first day with Koda—I wasn’t expecting that, and obviously, neither was Bree.” I chuckle. “Having an immediate attraction to all four suitors was also unexpected.”

Finnegan hums. “Why don’t we talk about Koda for a moment?”

“Sure, Finn. What do you want to know?”

“Bree told me that both of you were perfuming so hard that it even affected a few of the unmated betas. That’s definitely something I would call abnormal since I know Bree insists on scent blockers for those initial meetings. It’s expected that you’ll be able to get a hint of the suitors’ scents, but for it to affect these men and women who have been working on the show for two seasons? It’s interesting.”

Rolling my eyes, I shake my head. I hate it when he talks like this. “Yes, Finn. That’s what I said.”

He chuckles at my annoyance but doesn’t call me out on it. “How did it make you feel, though?”

“Gods, I hate that question, and it seems like all you do is ask it. I felt thrown off because it was unexpected. I wonder if we might be an omega pair like Sophia and Chase, but what are the chances of that happening two seasons in a row? But there’s no denying the connection. Bree said he was showing signs of a breakthrough heat after my accident. That’s why she allowed him to see me before I went on that do-over date with the day-two suitors. I’m not going to lie, he seems to be hit by whatever this connection is harder than me, but I don’t know if that’s because I have other suitors to worry about or if it’s just all in my head…” Trailing off, I bite my lip.

“With that kind of a physical reaction, there’s no way it’s all in your head, Evangeline, and you know that.” I glance up as Finn leans back in his chair. He seems deep in thought, and when he speaks again, his brogue is thicker. “There’s something to be said about having an instant connection to someone—it’s something I felt with my omega and she with me. But it’s not always easy to trust that. It makes you question it, makes you want to pick it apart. It makes you think it’s all in your head.”

I flush, knowing that while he’s talking about himself, he’s really talking about me. But his words resonate with me. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing, and that’s not fair to myself or Koda. This is why, even though I complain about it often, I know these sessions with Finn help me. He helps me understand what’s going on inside of me. He helps me take the chaos I don’t understand and turn it into something that I can comprehend.

“That makes sense.”

He laughs. “Of course it does. I know my shit.”

“And you’re so humble, too.” Shaking my head, I already know what he’s going to ask next. “The date with the day-two suitors obviously didn’t go as planned. I was scared out there on the water. I knew there was a chance I could die. My head was so muddled that I could barely tell what was up and what was down.”

“Do you really think I would’ve let you die, lass?” Finnegan’s voice is gruff as he leans forward to rest his elbows on his desk. “I would never have let that happen. The little shit alpha just jumped in before I could.”

I laugh at the way he’s talking about Alejandro. “Hey, now. Alejandro saved my life.”

He nods. “Don’t I know it. He shared some suspicions with me about Viktor having caused the accident on purpose—suspicions that I share. I know you’ve allowed him to remain on the show, and it’s not my place to tell you what to do—I would never do that. What I will do is ask you to be careful around him. Okay, lass?”

I want to be mad at him because I want the other suitors to stop being suspicious of him, but with Finn voicing his own concerns, I wonder if it was stupid of me to keep him on the show. It’s not like he made a great first impression on me, but he did seem friendlier this morning. He’s at least made a friend in Dustin. I just don’t know what to do about him, which is exactly what I tell Finn.

“It’s not my place to tell you what to do—I’ve already told you that,” he says with a laugh. “These sessions aren’t about me telling you what to do or how to feel. They’re about helping you talk through what you’re feeling and for you to figure out how to move forward.”

“Which is very unhelpful, I might add. But I know that. I know this is on me to figure out. I’m the one who has to decide what to believe and what to do about it. I’ll be cautious around him, but I need the others to cut him some slack, and I’m just not sure how to approach that yet. Maybe something will come to me in my sleep.” I wave off the thought, ready to move on. “Pack Reyes has been surprising. Paisley was very territorial with me at first, but once she loosened up, we got along well. Then Ana lost her shit on Tessa today, which was not okay. I’m planning to talk with her, and probably the pack as well, tomorrow. On the upside, the day-four suitors and I didn’t have anything weird happen,” I start before wrinkling my nose. “Okay, maybe allowing the betas to go down on me in the SUV was kind of weird. But I don’t regret it one bit.”

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