Page 54 of Resisting You

“Cotton candy,” Frey supplied. It must have been obvious that Renato was lost again. “But the machine’s broken.” He signed after he spoke when Rex looked at him, and the small boy pouted.

‘Sorry,’ Renato said. ‘Maybe ice cream?’

Rex lit up. ‘Ice cream!’ He bounced so hard Renato almost lost him, and he managed to get him to the ground before he took off like a shot, heading right for the arcade machines.

“Did I sign that wrong?” Renato asked.

Frey sighed and rubbed his hand down his face. “No. He’s just hyper. He’s on a steroid right now for his lungs, and it’s been a goddamn nightmare. Thanks for the ice cream suggestion, though,” Frey said, and he did not sound thankful. “Just what he needed. More sugar.”

Renato winced. “Sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

Frey softened after a beat. “Nah, it’s fine. That bitch up there was being nasty about him making noise. I’m getting so sick of the way people act like he’s a burden just because he’s loud.”

As if on cue, Rex let out a whooping holler as he pretended to drive on the machine. There weren’t a lot of people around, but most of them looked. Renato hadn’t really considered what it would be like for Frey and Rex, but he could easily envision the way people might react.

“Does he notice?”

Frey’s expression fell. “Yeah, he does. He doesn’t always know what people are saying about it, but he can tell they’re being dicks. He’s been a lot quieter these days, and I just…” Frey swallowed heavily. “I don’t want him to think he has to be quiet to make people happy. I want him to go to the movies and just be himself without us getting shushed or asked to leave.”

“He shouldn’t need to be,” Renato said. He looked down at Frey’s hands, which were twisting together, his movements full of anxious restlessness. “May I…may I join you?”

Frey blinked in surprise. “Uh. We’re here on his class trip, so?—”

“Of course,” Renato said quickly. “I didn’t mean to invite myself.”

“No, I—” Frey stopped, then let out a ragged sigh. “That would actually be nice. I haven’t really made a lot of friends with the other parents because I work so damn much, and being gay, they can get a little…”

“Judgy?” Renato offered.

Frey sighed and nodded, rubbing the back of his neck. “To put it politely. I volunteer as much as I can, but it’s not easy, and I hate when people make me feel like I’ve failed him on multiple fronts.”

Renato’s heart ached for him. “I don’t think you’ve failed him on any fronts.”

With a look of disbelief, Frey just turned his gaze away to watch his son. “Well, anyway, if you don’t mind that the movie’s an old Disney flick, I wouldn’t mind the company.”

Renato held back a smile, though for the first time in a while, he felt like grinning. “I wasn’t really here to watch anything. I just came to, you know…” He trailed off and flapped his hands uselessly at his sides.

“Right,” Frey said very softly. “Your husband.”

Renato had almost forgotten that Frey knew. “I missed my evening yesterday.”

“Can I—” Frey stopped and shook his head. “Sorry. Never mind.”

He started to walk away, but Renato caught his arm and pulled him back. “Ask me. I’ll answer.”

Frey chewed on his lower lip, then said, “Did he want you to do this? I mean, was this a last request kind of thing, or?—”

Renato laughed softly and shook his head. “No. If there’s such a thing as the afterlife and Grady’s watching, he’s probably screaming at me for being so foolish. This was just the last thing he’d done for his job that lasted. I lost in him an accident, so I didn’t get the chance to do something silly, like save his last voicemail.”

“Fuck,” Frey said, his voice trembling a little. “That is so sad.”

Renato finally gave in and smiled. “It’s pathetic, is what it is. It’s been a long time. I’m not drowning in my grief anymore. I just…miss him sometimes, is all.”

Frey stared, then lifted his hand and very carefully traced a touch along the corner of Renato’s lips. “You smiled.”

Renato raised a brow. “Yes. People do that. Even the grumpy ones.”

“Yeah. But I’ve never seen you smile before now,” Frey said, and then he turned and walked toward Rex without giving Renato a chance to respond.

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