Page 117 of The Life-Changing Magic of Falling in Love

‘It’s a crossword puzzle,’ she looks up at me to check, a soft smile playing about her lips. ‘Let’s see, you’ve put in two letter “o’s”. Oh, 2 down is Love and 3 across is Oscars?’

‘Correct,’ I grin back.

‘Hey, what’s the time?’ Zach suddenly says, looking first outside at how dark it’s got and then at his watch. ‘Shoot, I’ve got to bounce, I told the guys I’d drop in on their game. This was fun though. Ashleigh, you coming?’

‘But it’s still early.’

‘It sucks I had to stay later at work. Can you imagine if I was my own boss? I’d still be working, right?’

‘You really can’t stay longer?’

‘I promised the guys. We’re finished here, right? We can bring the brownies with us. Or you can stay and we’ll catch up later in the week.’

If it was me on this date with her, I wouldn’t leave early for anyone or anything.

‘I’ll stay and help clear up,’ I say.

‘It’s okay, I promised I’d help. I’ll walk you to the door,’ Ashleigh tells Zach and I hate how her voice sounds so accepting. So resigned. It makes me want to ask Oz and Carlos where the hell they found this guy because to coin a phrase from Mrs. Lundy, “Ashleigh deserves someone who’d walk through fire for her.”

Chapter Thirty-Five

IN A DRESS, GIVING OUT MY ADDRESS

Ashleigh

Carlos and Oz are ready to declare the evening a hot success and launch Bake-Dates but I really don’t know what to make of tonight.

I don’t know why I wore the dress.

Or wore my hair down.

Or put the perfume on.

‘Yeah, you do.’ I feel like Sarah would be saying, so all right then, I don’t want to analyse it – I only want to enjoy what feels like calm and quiet for the first time tonight as George and I sit next to each other on the fire escape out the back of the bakery.

He clinks his bottle of beer against mine and reaches into the box for another brownie, saying, ‘So that happened.’

‘It did.’

‘I think they might do better with real people.’

‘Are you saying we didn’t keep it real, George?’

He turns his head towards me and, as always, when he studies me, I get caught up in the blueness of his eyes again and my heart rate accelerates.

‘I feel like I did,’ he says, quietly. ‘Did you?’

It’s hard to say. Lately I’ve been feeling … lighter? Happier. More optimistic. At least until I suddenly become aware of what I’m feeling and then I’m cloaked in guilt. I don’t ever want Sarah to think I’ve forgotten her. Which is part of grief I guess because deep down I know she’d want me to be happy and living a full life. She didn’t work as a nurse helping to fix people up, so they could be sent home to be miserable.

‘I think it was real, no matter how much I wished it wasn’t,’ I say.

‘What bit would you change if you could?’

‘I wouldn’t be sitting here in this dress.’

He stares at the top of his beer bottle. ‘You regret not leaving with Zach?’

‘No, I meant I’d be sitting out here in jeans instead of this dress.’

---