Page 27 of The Life-Changing Magic of Falling in Love

Not easy.

‘And what were the circumstances in which you made this promise?’

I turn to look at her. ‘What do you mean?’

The sprightly eighty-plus-year-old has a twinkle in her eye as she says, ‘Well, if you were kidnapped, tied up and it was a condition of your freedom, that’s not really a fair promise now, is it?’

I think I love Mrs. Lundy. ‘If only I could put that spin on it. But it was more of a “I think you’d be really good at this and it would really help me out” request.’

Mrs. Lundy looks at me for what seems like an eternity before she simply nods her head. ‘And you’re the sort of person who follows through.’

I pull the plug to release the soapy water. Wipe my hands. Want to admit exactly how long it has taken me to follow through on this promise.

‘You don’t get a lot of that nowadays,’ Mrs. Lundy murmurs. ‘Impressive.’

‘I guess I wish I felt more ready.’

‘It can be hard when you build up a time frame in your head for when you think something’s got to be achieved by.’

‘Right. But I can’t keep letting myself off this thing and I think I’ll be okay as soon as I get there. You know? Get into it? At least, I’m almost sure. But, what if I’m not? What if—’ I head back out to the dining table in the hope I missed a stack of china to wash.

‘What’s the worst that can happen?’

‘I don’t know, I guess, I might have a meltdown?’ For meltdown read full-on-step-back-to-let-the-crazy-lady-pass moment.

‘And?’

‘I don’t want to have a meltdown in front of people I respect.’

‘Ah.’

‘Or in front of people who have been through worse than me.’

‘One day you’re going to have to tell me your story.’

I can’t imagine Mrs. Lundy settling for my story being that I’m in a job I love and have a family who, while annoying, make me feel loved and supported. But life’s all about nuance and, I’ve discovered, about how you’ll find ways of not doing what you promised you were going to do when it one hundred per cent takes you out of your comfort zone.

I try and accept the fact that the table is empty and I really have no more cleaning scheduled for the day. ‘Words of wisdom, please?’

Mrs. Lundy bursts into delighted laughter. ‘What makes you think I’m wise, dear?’

‘What are you talking about? With age comes wisdom, right?’

‘Not always been my experience but let’s see…’ She brings a finger to her lips and taps thoughtfully against them. ‘How about, “Accept that whatever happens, you’ll be able to deal with it.”?’

‘Um…’ In theory this is what I’ve been trying to tell myself. In practice it really doesn’t transfer.

‘No? Well then, how about, feel the fear and do it anyway?’

‘I have the first part down. It’s exactly what stops me from following through with the second part,’ I admit.

‘Wait, I’ve got the perfect advice,’ Mrs. Lundy suggests. ‘Don’t be a pussy.’

My eyes widen to the size of one of the saucers I’ve just cleaned. That’s just the sort of thing Sarah would say.

‘Um … okay. Don’t be a wuss. Just like that?’

She nods her head like it is the easiest thing in the world. ‘Just like that.’

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