Page 94 of Reluctantly His

“You did that because I didn’t tell you otherwise. I had always gone along with Father’s plans before. This was the first time I had ever chosen something for myself. If the announcement had been made a few weeks ago, I might have wanted it. Or at least, I wouldn’t have wanted anything more than to make Father happy.”

Luc nodded, then stopped for a second, took a deep breath, and let it out, his shoulders sagging. “Then I learn the man we were going to entrust with your future actually staged the entire dangerous fucking stunt to somehow win the motherfucking scandal rag media cycle. It was all a fucking PR stunt by that stupid bastard cunt asshole.”

Olivia and I exchanged a look as we smothered smiles. Although we of course shared his anger and outrage, my serious, business-like brother was amusing when he swore unabated.

Olivia then chimed in, “Don’t forget cheap. If he had just paid the men the two-hundred and fifty thousand he had promised, none of this may have happened.”

Tossing her a look for goading on our brother, I patted his hand. “I’m right here. A little banged up and a little worse for wear. But I will be fine.”

“And then I find out that you have something going on with your guard. I don’t even know what to think about that. It just seems so… unlikely.”

I frowned as I hugged the blanket up closer to my chest, somehow already missing the warmth of Reid’s presence.

Bracing for the worst, I asked, “What do you mean?”

“Reid is just so…”

“Poor? Working class?” I asked, wondering if Luc really thought so little of me.

“No, I was going to say blunt. He’s rough and in your face, completely uncultured. He’s just so Texas and such a Marine. You are soft-spoken, gentle, refined, and I’m having a hard time seeing it.”

I nodded, thinking about what exactly Luc was objecting to, and if I looked at it from his point of view, I could see what he meant.

He and Amelia came from the same background and had similar interests.

Their coming together may have been a little unorthodox, but their goals were aligned.

They strengthened each other.

The same could have been said about Olivia and Marksen.

They came from the same background, they knew the same people, and they’d also had a rather unorthodox meet cute. She and Marksen made the perfect pairing. They pushed each other to work harder toward their own goals. They knew how to help each other.

If Reid needed help with a mission, I would be so out of my depth that it wasn’t even funny. Reid wouldn’t know where to start if I needed help with a dinner party or music.

“I think,” I paused, trying to figure out exactly how to put my feelings into words, “I think I don’t know who I am.”

“How many pain meds are you on?” he asked with a rueful smile, making me laugh.

I placed my hand on my stomach, trying to stop the laugh from jostling my wounds too badly. It hurt, but it was kind of worth it.

“No, I mean my entire life, I have done what I was told, not what I wanted. I have let our father groom me to be what he envisioned. The only time I have ever stood up for myself or fought for anything was for my cello, and even then, it wasn’t to play professionally or follow my dreams. It was to be able to volunteer at charity events. I fought for a compromise.”

“And you’re saying you don’t like that?”

“I don’t like that for my entire life. Other people have made my choices for me. You are following our father’s footsteps, but you’re not letting him dictate your life. You are making your own decisions when it comes to the family empire. Olivia has completely disregarded what Father wanted and forged her own path, trying to make him proud. I just played the good little princess, and it’s not what I want anymore. I don’t think it ever was.”

“Then what do you want?” The question wasn’t said with malice or sarcasm.

He was genuinely asking, and I was at a loss.

It was such a simple question, something that I should have been able to answer, but I just didn’t know.

“You know, I never really gave it much thought because it never even occurred to me to fight for what I want. I don’t know when, but at some point, I stopped considering my own desires because being told I couldn’t have them hurt too much.”

“Okay,” Luc said sitting back in the chair. “You don’t need to know everything right now. But tell me one thing. One thing that you know is incredibly important to you and you are not willing to compromise on.”

“Reid.” His name flew through my lips before I even had a chance to consider it. And I didn’t regret it.

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