Page 93 of A Helpin g Hand for the Village Nurse

‘Stop that! One of us ought to have a fella, and as nobody’s remotely interested in me…’

‘Now you can stop that!’ Ottilie shot back. ‘I’m sure plenty are interested – you just haven’t found the right one yet.’

‘I haven’t found one at all. I’d go for the wrong one right now; it’d be nice just to be asked.’

‘That makes you sound like a charity case and you should never feel like that. I hope you don’t.’

Stacey grimaced. ‘Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with me, you know? Why can’t I find a nice man?’

‘You live in Britain’s smallest village, which hardly helps.’

Stacey laughed. ‘True. I’m sure it’s not Britain’s smallest village but I take your point. What a pair we are.’

‘There’s no hope, is there?’

‘There is for you if you stop being so stubborn about it for five minutes.’

‘I can’t.’ Ottilie got two mugs out of a cupboard. ‘I’m…’

‘What?’

‘Scared.’ She let out a sigh as she looked back at Stacey.

‘Scared it’s too soon?’

‘Scared I’m going into it for the wrong reasons. And even if I’m not, scared that I’ll fall for him.’

‘That’s sort of the idea, isn’t it?’

‘I don’t know. There’s…’ Ottilie paused. ‘What do you know about him?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘We talked about it – we both agreed he’s got trust issues.’

‘And you’re about the most reliable, trustworthy person I know.’

‘You hardly know me.’

‘I know enough. I know what my instincts tell me.’

‘But what happened to make him like that? Is it too big to get past? What if he’s really screwed up, like beyond-help screwed up? And I go blundering in and get involved and it’s all a mess?’

‘It might happen, but if anyone can help him, you can.’

‘OK,’ Ottilie said slowly. ‘Say I could. Say I even want to – and let me tell you I have enough baggage of my own to deal with. Say we ended up…I don’t know, like…happy?—’

‘In love, you mean?’ Stacey raised her eyebrows.

‘I’m not going to say that word because it feels like tempting fate, but what if things get good? And what if something bad happens again? What if I lose again? I don’t think I can do it. I think a second time would finish me off.’

‘What if something bad doesn’t happen? What if it’s all great? What if you turn your back on this and it ends up being the biggest mistake of your life?’

‘If I did turn my back on it, I don’t suppose I’d ever know either way.’

‘Don’t you at least want to try?’

‘Yes… No…’ Ottilie shook her head as if to clear it. ‘I don’t have a clue.’

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