Page 34 of A Helpin g Hand for the Village Nurse

‘Of course,’ she said, forcing brightness to her voice. ‘This is good news.’

‘Are you sure? Because if you need someone to talk to, I can get?—’

‘Not the liaison guys, not again. I know they do good work but don’t waste your precious resources on me. I’ve had six months to get my head around it and…well, this has thrown me a bit, but I’ll be OK.’

‘I was going to say I’d get a day off and come out to see you. Where is it you’ve moved to? Somewhere in the Lakes, right?’

That familiar, groundless fear swept over Ottilie again. She didn’t want to say where she was, not even to Faith, whom she ought to trust above anyone else, the colleague Josh had valued. He’d always called her his ‘work wife’. They were close friends, but Faith was also too close to the case, too close to people who might discover her location, even if Faith never meant it to happen, even if she never meant to let it slip, she might.

It was silly – ridiculous even – and yet Ottilie couldn’t shake the doubts.

‘Honestly, I’m fine,’ she said briskly. ‘When I get a free day, I’ll come to see you. It’d be nice to catch up if you have time – and I’m already starting to miss Manchester.’

‘Sure, I’d like that. Text me when you have a day off and we’ll grab coffee. There’s a new place near Piccadilly station, supposed to be nice. If you wanted to come in on the train it means we could grab a couple of proper drinks too.’

‘That sounds good. Sorry, but I…Thanks for calling, Faith. I really appreciate you keeping me up to date.’

‘No problem. You take care, right?’

‘You too. Bye.’

Ottilie watched the screen go dark as the call came to an end. Then she grasped the phone tight in both hands and stared into space. Another butterfly landed close by, this one scarlet and black, as delicate and ethereal as the first, but she hardly noticed it.

‘Ottilie…’

She turned to see Lavender at the back door.

‘Are you all right?’

‘Um…sure…sorry – someone from back home.’

‘Are you sure you’re all right? You look?—’

‘I’m fine. Did you need me?’

‘I’m about to open the doors for the afternoon surgery. You’ve missed the last cup of tea, but I could bring one through to the treatment room for you…’

Ottilie pushed herself up from the wall and forced a smile. She seemed to be doing so much of that these past few months she did it with barely a conscious thought.

‘You’re an angel,’ she said. ‘Thank you. I’ll go and get set up.’

‘Full clinic again,’ Lavender said as Ottilie followed her inside. ‘Doesn’t look too bad, though. Quite a lot of routine stuff.’

‘That’s good,’ Ottilie said, hardly registering what Lavender was saying. Her thoughts were all over the place, but she was going to have to pull herself together –and quick – if she was going to function the rest of the afternoon.

CHAPTER TEN

Throughout her working life, Ottilie had done shifts. As a student nurse she’d often been given the worst: long nights and stupidly early mornings, bank holidays and weekends and basically the times that nobody else wanted to do. Sometimes she worked two back to back, and they were the worst – her legs would throb and her back would ache, and she’d knock off feeling as if she’d never slept in her life. It was part and parcel of the job; people didn’t get ill on demand and certainly didn’t wait until it was convenient for the medical staff, but sometimes it could be draining. Despite this, she’d loved her job at the hospital so much that she’d never really questioned the need. Coming here to Thimblebury, working in a surgery with clearly defined hours (apart from emergencies, but Fliss mostly dealt with those) was a novelty. Being home every evening was certainly a novelty, one she’d looked forward to enjoying when she’d been working her notice in Manchester.

But tonight, once again, her fears were getting the better of her. The phone call from Josh’s police colleague, Faith, had rattled her. She’d found it difficult to think of anything else all afternoon, and though she was quite sure she hadn’t made any mistakes during afternoon surgery, she couldn’t honestly say for sure.

Tonight was also her first film club at Magnus and Geoff’s home-built cinema. She’d been so looking forward to it, but now, with her mood through the floor, she wondered whether she ought to make an excuse not to go.

Josh would never have done that of course. Josh would have picked himself up, defied those who might ruin his life and gone out just to make a point. He’d have wanted Ottilie to do the same, and so, despite how miserable she was, she decided that not only would she go for that reason, but also because she wanted to make friends and settle into Thimblebury quickly. Only then would these moments of sadness and fear start to lessen until they stopped completely. At least she hoped so. And the best way to do that was to get involved in everything the village had to offer.

While she had a few hours until the screening was due to start, she decided to make dips to go with the boxes of crackers and breadsticks she’d bought online to take and share. Nothing fancy but something to take her mind off her anxieties. The cheeriest playlist she had blasted out from her music dock and she forced herself to sing along as she chopped cucumber and garlic, coriander and mint. She might look quite mad to anyone who happened to peer in through the window at that moment – a face of misery, singing at the top of her lungs anyway, but if it banished the wretchedness she’d be as mad as it took. She’d heard it said that to make a happy face was halfway to being happy, but so far it was taking some effort.

She wondered who might attend the film club. Magnus said that it could be anywhere up to twenty of them, but that depended on what the film was. Tonight they were watching Chicago, chosen by Magnus and Geoff. Ottilie liked a good musical, but they weren’t for everyone. Because she didn’t know how many to cater for, she’d phoned the shop to ask Magnus, but he didn’t really know either. He’d got rough numbers from people he’d asked, but he said that even people who confirmed attendance earlier in the day didn’t always turn up.

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