Page 37 of Hunter

“It’s not good news, guys,” he sighs, then tries to smile, but it’s forced…pained. “I got the big C and, as it turns out, not long left.”

The air in the room seems to freeze, along with all the blood in my body. I lose feeling in my extremities and soon become dizzy. I open my mouth to scream, to yell, to cry, but no sound comes out.

“What the hell are you talking about?!” Phoenix almost yells as Dad closes his eyes, no doubt having expected this kind of reaction from his fiery, but oh, so troubled son.

“I’m dying, son,” Dad says softly, and it’s enough to let the tears fall from my eyes. I knew the cough was bad, knew he had been throwing up after I made him meals, otherwise refraining from eating altogether, and I also knew he was losing weight and was incredibly tired all the time. But I guess I had been hoping it was nothing, just me being the overly worried mother figure of the family.

“W-where?” I ask through a whimper, and he holds his hand out for mine. I instantly run to him and huddle up on his lap, just like when I was five years old and still not talking.

“My lungs, my esophagus, my throat, lots of other places by now,” he says, “they reckon it’s through second-hand smoke, so that’s the first thing you’re going to get rid of in the bar, Phoenix. Ain’t no way I’m letting you be at risk from this. Course, if you wanna sell, that’s up to you, but otherwise, this place is yours.”

“I don’t want the fucking bar! I want my dad! This is bullshit!” he shouts, pacing about the room as though he can somehow physically fight this for him. But he can’t, no one can, not even science.

“Come on, Phoenix…Warren,” he says quietly, making my brother finally stop and look at him with so much rage swimming inside of him, I can’t stand to look at it. “I don’t have much longer left, I’ve only told you now because…well, because I don’t think I can stay out of bed for much longer. Every damn part of me hurts and I’m so tired and sick all the time. I’m so sorry to both of you.”

“How long?” I ask, not really wanting to know the answer but needing to find out anyway.

“Three months…if I’m lucky.” He shrugs and I begin sobbing against his weak chest, knowing the disease is slowly growing stronger right next to where I’m lying. “Course, given how I’m feeling, you might not consider it lucky.”

He tries to laugh but only gets a rage-fueled expression from Phoenix and even harder crying from me.

“So, we lose our mother and our father! This…this is…fuck!” Phoenix practically spits and runs out the door in such a temper, neither one of us tries to call him back. It’s best to let him work his way through it. Besides, right now, Dad needs me more. In fact, we stay holding one another until he tells me he needs to go and lie down. Sadly, I think he also needs to go and let it all out and I know he’s too proud to do that in front of me. I ask if he needs anything and then help him to his room where he seems so much smaller than he was before his admission.

I wander out into the bar and walk around slowly, having my own cry as I consider this place being the evil that has been slowly killing the one parent I have left. I run my hand over the tables, the chairs, and the bar, letting the tears run freely down my cheeks. I end up freezing like a statue in the middle of the dance floor, a raised platform that the younger crowd uses when we have live music. I don’t move, don’t release a sound, don’t even breathe for a moment or two. I have no idea what to do that will do the pain running inside of me any justice.

The door bursts open and I look up to see Tony running over to me, scooping me up tightly inside his arms and letting me cry silently against him. He rubs my back in soothing circles, kissing my head in between shushing me gently.

“It’s ok, baby, I’m here, let it all out,” he whispers. “I’m here for you no matter what; you’re my love, my life, my blood, and I’m never letting you go.”

_____

Dad’s funeral was two months later, a small affair of close friends, where he was buried next to our mother. Emilio and Ava were buried a stone’s throw away and I caught both boys looking over to their graves, even though Tony’s hand clung to mine tightly. Phoenix was a silent mess with a blank face, but you could see the storm brewing behind those eyes. I remember my father’s last words to me, they had only been last week, but I think they’ll be ingrained inside my head for the rest of my life.

“Lou, you are so beautiful, just like your mom was, inside and out. I worried about you for so long, not talking and all, but now, I…well, I can’t tell you how proud I am of you, Louisa. And I sure do wish I was going to be around to see all the beautiful babies you’ll make with Tony; he’s a good boy, he’ll treat you right.

“Dad, we’ve only just started dating,” I told him, even though I blushed with a smile over the thought of it.

“I know, but give an old, dying man something good to take with him. Me and your mom will be smiling down on you when you guys get married. Course, you’ll have to let your brother do the honor of walking you down the aisle.”

“Dad,” I sobbed, “please.”

“Come here, sweetheart,” he said and I got on the bed to lie next to him, the whole time crying as he stroked my hair with weak movements, his breathing light and labored. “It’s now your brother I’m worried about. Lou, he’s gonna need you more than you know. He’s so angry, so bitter with the world, so…hurt. Look after him, won’t you.”

“You know I will, I love you both so much,” I whimpered beside him.

“Good girl Lou; you’ve always been my good girl.”

Phoenix didn’t speak beyond monosyllabic grunts for nearly four months. He kept getting into fights, running ‘errands’ for Javier, and other activities I didn’t want to know about. His clothes were always covered in blood, but I never asked who, when, or why, I just washed them or incinerated them out back. It’s only because I had Tony that I didn’t fall apart completely.

Chapter 16

Daniel

Why in the hell did I offer to get lunch for the office today? I’m glad Lou is off apartment hunting, particularly when her current situation is somewhat unhealthy from what I’ve witnessed, but it does mean we’re without her talents for storing everyone’s order in her head and somehow managing to bypass the queues. I’m stuck between a woman who has no semblance of personal space and a teenage boy who hacks back phlegm before wiping his nose across his jacket sleeve. The guy at the front is ordering lunch for the entire city from the sounds of things, and I’m one nerve away from blowing the whole lot and ordering pizza instead.

Twenty minutes later, and I’m finally on my way back to the office when I notice a guy, who I believe to be Lou’s ex-boyfriend, hanging around outside our office like a shifty, bad smell. As soon as he spots me, he lifts the corners of his mouth, all the while pinning me with a completely murderous gaze. I can’t tell if he wants to rub his hold on Louisa in my face or is just here to out and out kill me dead in the street; probably both.

At first, I walk past him with a look of indifference, feigning ignorance to his presence, but when he tsks me from a few feet away, I have a natural response to call him up on it.

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