Page 13 of Save You

Tom works as an apprentice draughtsman for EMI during the day, but also drives the buses at night for extra cash, being that he’s still on a trainee’s rather frugal wages. He always tells me how he will be truly in the money once he’s qualified, but I think he’s one of the best human beings I’ve ever met, with or without money. However, I understand his drive to earn, for the house is mortgaged. The plan is to pay it off as soon as possible, so Sadie can train to be a nurse. It’s her passion; I guess that’s why she’s so good with Mrs Topple.

By the time Tom arrives home, late at night, the guests have either gone out for the evening or are already in bed. The poor man always looks beat, but still offers that devilish grin when he says hello to the both of us. Sadie and I routinely save our meals so we can eat with him, even if it’s just to be a sounding-off board about the long day he’s had.

Sadie showed me how to cook one of Tom’s favorites, mince and dumplings, with plenty of vegetables and lashings of gravy. I was quite ashamed over how much she had to show me, right down to peeling a carrot. In my defense, I was never meant for what was considered ‘menial work’ around the house. Instead, I was supposed to be a porcelain doll to look at while allowing my husband to rape and abuse me whenever the mood so took him, which in his case, was daily.

Tom groans theatrically after his first mouthful of food, making Sadie roll her eyes and shake her head, no doubt feeling embarrassed by her older brother. I laugh unashamedly, always loving his perpetual good mood and friendly humor. Two things I have never seen from a man before.

“That, ladies, is worth working my arse off for,” he declares, pointing to the plate with his fork before tucking in again. “How’s Mother?”

Tom is referring to Mrs Topple, who he has affectionately taken on as his own surrogate mother. I’ve learned that his real mum is always referred to as ‘Ma’, whereas his adopted one is always ‘Mother’.

“She’s taken a shine to Mary, here!” Sadie gestures to me and smiles.

“Why, hello Mary, nice to meet you!” He holds his hand out for mine, but I simply shake my head and nudge his hand away, feeling too shy to make proper physical contact with him. “She’s a lovely old lady. It’s why we only charge her for one night a week, isn’t it, Sadie?”

I instantly feel guilty, knowing that I’m not paying them anything. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve pleaded with them to let me offer something, anything, so they know how much I appreciate them letting me stay here.

“Will you help me find someone who might want to buy my rings, Tom?” I ask politely. “I can’t keep staying here for nothing, but I don’t know where to go for something like that.”

“No!” he replies bluntly and carries on eating without another word. I’m a little shocked that he’s suddenly so unwilling to help me, but I guess he’s already done enough. Feeling beyond awkward, I drop my head so as to avoid his eye contact.

“Ok,” I whisper, feeling beyond embarrassed by his rejection.

“No, I mean you’re not selling them,” he says, placing his hand over mine, strangely always aware of what I’m thinking or feeling. His hand is warm and comforting, like a hot water bottle on icy feet when you climb into bed at night. “Not to pay us, anyway. Save them for when your wee one is born.”

“Tom, I can’t keep freeloading off you and your sister,” I argue, “this is a business and I have the means to pay. Please?”

“It’s fine,” Sadie chimes in, “we never let Ma’s room out anyway, and if you really feel the need to contribute, just continue helping me out. I’m already beginning to study, so I’m a little on top of things when I go back to school. You’d be doing me a favor!”

“Really?” I ask, feeling only half-convinced.

“Really!” Tom smiles as Sadie gets up to wash her plate and put the kettle on. “Sadie, can you give us a sec?”

“Sure, but I wouldn’t touch him, Rosalie,” she sighs, “the number of women that come through these doors…” She raises her eyebrows judgmentally while Tom jokingly mutters some obscenity under his breath.

As soon as the door closes behind her, he rounds his attention back onto me, looking even more boyish than he usually does. In fact, I would say he’s looking a little nervous, as though he has something to say but doesn’t know how to get the words out correctly. It instantly makes me feel just as anxious, particularly as he tries and fails to put a sentence together no less than five times.

“I have an idea, Rosalie,” he laughs with nervousness while looking toward the floor, “and I’m not going to lie, it’s a little out there. I hope it doesn’t offend you, and I also hope you don’t think I’m trying to suggest anything untoward. I mean, technically, you’re married, but as far as anyone around here knows, you’re a single lady who is about to be very obviously pregnant.”

I blush when I realize what he’s struggling to say. My reputation around here is going to drop like a bag of hammers as soon as people see my pregnant belly, especially in the absence of any wedding rings. This is bound to affect their business. Even I know enough to understand that reputation is important when you’re trying to sell cozy holiday rooms in an area that offers plenty of competition. Not only that, but I am also more than aware that he has a number of ‘female friends’ who might not take too kindly to having a pregnant, unmarried woman living with him. At the end of the day, people are going to ask questions. They always do when there’s a whiff of a scandal.

“Rose, don’t be embarrassed in front of me,” he whispers when I look away from him with my cheeks rapidly heating up, “I know why you’re running, but others don’t. So, I want to give you this.”

I look back up to where his hand has hold of mine, his other one now holding out a small, golden, wedding band, fit for a lady’s finger. At first, I look at him with nothing but complete bewilderment, but when he gives me his boyish smirk and slips on a man’s wedding band over his own left ring finger, I instantly gasp over what he’s suggesting.

“Why?” I almost choke on the word. “Why would you do that for me? You don’t even know me. No, I can’t!” I push away from him, causing the chair to scrape backward against the linoleum floor, with nothing but thoughts of running up to my room where I can privately collapse into an emotional heap on top of his mother’s bed.

“Wait!” He calls out, jumping up just as quickly as I did. “Just listen to me, Rose, please? Just hear me out!”

That bedroom is still calling to me, but how can I say no to someone who has done nothing but offer me kindness, and is still willing to further upset his life for mine? So, pulling up my big girl panties, I take in a deep breath and slowly turn around to face him. I watch as his gentle, beautiful face lets out a relieved breath before gesturing for me to sit back down with him. I am reluctant to do so, but only because I know I can’t let him persuade me to sacrifice himself for me.

“Thank you,” he says on a sigh of relief as I bite my lips together, trying to stop myself from flustering over telling him he has nothing to thank me for. He should also stop being so nice to me, because I’m not used to anything remotely like it.

“Ma got pregnant with me out of wedlock,” he says matter-of-factly, though the look in his eyes gives away the fact that it’s obviously a hard subject for him to talk about. “She fell in love with the arse who helped to make yours truly, and, well, you can guess what happened to make me.” He laughs nervously as he begins to twist the ring around on his finger. “He left her as soon as he found out she was expecting. As it turns out, he was already engaged to someone else.”

“Oh,” I say rather dumbly, “I’m sorry, Tom.”

He shrugs, takes another deep breath, then leans forward to finish his sad tale.

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