Page 21 of Brutal Secrets

“You bastard, it’s so cold,” she says.

The icy air clears my head and cools my blood.

Kesera scrambles out from under me and hurls a snowball over her shoulder as she skips back to the heat of the sauna, a naked, laughing vision.

After another round of warming up and cooling off in the darkness outside, I’ve gotten some kind of control of myself. But more than that, I feel light. Joyful.

We’re kicking off our clothes and boots, and grinning at each other like a pair of children by the time we get back to the house. Maybe it was rolling in the snow without clothes on or throwing snowballs at each other on the way back from the banya.

She shakes her hair out of the beanie and throws the snow-encrusted hat at me. “Catch.”

It flies across the room but I let it fall, pulling her onto my lap instead, inhaling kisses from her mouth like air. I haven’t been this boy since I was nine and got into the orphanage with Sasha. It’s like wearing clothes that don’t quite fit, making me feel pressed out of shape in my own skin.

I lean down and swallow her kisses whole, thrusting my tongue into her mouth, knocking back her little moans like shots of vodka. “I need to fuck you now, zolotaya.”

She stares up at me with a dazed look as I carry her to the bedroom and drop her on the bed. I’m surprised as she tears at her clothes, stripping off the layers until she’s kneeling in front of me. Her damp bronze-and-golden curls float around her shoulders, her tiny breasts peeking up at me through her hair. Her pretty nipples have taken on a deep plum color, sore where I’ve sucked and bitten them till she cried out.

Seeing where my eyes drop, she pulls her hair over her shoulders, places her hands underneath her tits, and cups them, though there’s not enough to fill her hands. She lifts them like an offering and arches her back.

I don’t move. I want to fall on her like a wild animal and bite and mark her skin, so I hold still, quivering as I listen to her breathe. She lies back against the pillows and spreads her legs, her glistening pink pussy opening like a flower in front of me.

“Vadim, I need you. I want you so much.” She’s opened her body like a present, stripping off the wrapping and gifting it to me. Her fingertips twist her nipples.

And it’s too much.

I don’t think. Not about her pleasure, not about a condom, not about a thing. My mind is a blank field of fresh snow as I fall on her and push deep into her wet heat. She tenses, adjusting to me, and I still above her.

“You’re so big,” she says.

I lean down and suck her neck, marking her skin like the animal I am. “No, baby, you’re so tiny. But take me, my love. You can do it for me, can’t you?”

Her hair tickles my forehead as she nods.

“Tell me.”

“Yes. All of you. I want everything.”

With her permission, I let go and rip into her, slamming into her tiny body again and again. I’m a fucking animal, making her scream as I bottom out inside her, pressing all the way and tearing another strange noise from her throat.

“Christ, yes, take it. Take all of me,” I shout in Russian.

She shouldn’t understand, yet she does, twining her limbs around me like ivy and pulling me closer than I’ve been to anyone.

I must be hurting her, but I can’t stop. I want to eat her alive. Kissing, sucking, biting. I want to mark every inch of her as I push into her.

The sounds she makes. Keening noises. Each time I hit the heart of her, she breathes out a soft little mew, like a kitten. It sends me over the edge, and I bury my face in her neck, inhaling the scent of summer flowers as I get drunk on her. I groan into her shoulder and bite the soft skin of her neck as I wind my arms under her tiny body and lift her by the waist. I raise her hips so that I can sling her ankles over my shoulders and get deeper.

Her hands grip the sheets as I move faster, harder. The room echoes with the sounds of the bed banging against the wall and her breathless gasps as I drive into her like a monster. She’s gripping the headboard and pushing back against me, urging me deeper. It makes me want to break her apart, but it’s me who’s breaking as her back bows and her pussy contracts around me, pulling my soul out of me as white light explodes behind my eyelids. Snow, ice, nothingness. I’m nowhere and everywhere as I collapse on top of her, crushing her tiny body with my weight.

I move to pull away from her, horrified at the way I’ve brutalized her, but her arms hold me tight. The fingernails of one hand dig into my shoulder as her other hand winds through the hair at the nape of my neck.

“Not yet, darling,” she whispers in my ear. “I feel so close to you. A few more minutes.”

I don’t meet her eyes yet. I’m too stunned to speak, let alone look at her, so I balance my weight on my forearms and breathe into the perfume that rises off the skin between her neck and shoulder. Her hands map rivers and forests over my scalp, and she presses her mouth against my hair.

Lifting up, I stare down at her in stunned wonder. “Are you okay, zolotaya?” I ask, fearful of the response, but her smile rips a hole in my chest. She looks lit up from within.

“I’ve never felt better in my life.”

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