He kisses me again, on the lips this time but the heat from earlier has gone and when he gets up, I’m left feeling cold and more restless than ever.
“I’ll see you tonight?” he asks, and I nod.
Relief washes over him, and he gives me a small smile. “I’ll leave first. Give it a few minutes before?—”
“I know the drill, Elliot.”
“Until later then.”
“Later.”
I watch as he disappears out of the room, then I inhale a shuddering breath.
How can being with someone be so exhilarating and so exhausting all at the same time?
He makes me so happy. He makes me feel so beautiful and special. And then he leaves, and all those old insecurities come rushing back.
A small, defeated sigh slips out of me as I compose myself and get ready to go back to class and pretend.
The thing about pretending though, sometimes you’re only fooling yourself.
“Have you spoken to Elliot yet?” Tally asks me as we file out of the building sometime later.
Classes are over for another week, which means we’re another week closer to exams and the end of the year. At least, for them.
“No, why?”
“Oh, crap. I… I’m not sure I’m supposed to say anything yet.”
“Tally…” I warn, not liking where this is going.
She laces her arm through mine and gives me a secretive smile. “Fine. But when he tells you later, don’t tell him I told you. We’re going out tonight. All of us.”
“We are?”
“Yes. Group date, baby.”
It’s hard not to be infected by her enthusiasm and excitement bubbles up inside me.
“Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise. But don’t worry, the guys know we have to be discreet. We’re probably going out of town.”
“And Elliot definitely knows about it? I mean, he wants us to go… together?”
“What? Of course he does.” Her brows knit as she takes in my hesitant expression. “Abs? What’s wrong?”
“It’s just been a long week,” I confess.
“I know it isn’t easy right now. But Elliot is dealing with it. Everything’s going to be fine, babe. You’ll see.”
Her words lift my spirits a little after the way me and Elliot left things earlier. And it will be nice to do something with our friends, like a real, normal couple.
“What should I wear?” I ask. “I don’t want to be too underdressed or overdressed.”
“Oak said we’re not clubbing. So nothing too dressy.”
“Okay.” I can do that, I think. “Is it weird I’m nervous?”