Page 109 of Forbidden Game

“No, Syd. I can’t. I fucked up. It feels like the sky’s falling, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.” He opens his eyes, and I’m stopped by the dead look of defeat in them.

“I don’t get it. It was just a match.” My voice is small and confused.

I hug myself tighter.

Every part of me is screaming to do something to make this better. I’m freaked out because I’ve never seen him like this. I’ve never seen Parker so desolate, so without hope.

Sure, he messed up the run. I watched it twice through on my flight over and saw the exact moment his attention strayed. I also saw the tension he tried to hide the second he took the stage, the precursor to his mental state. They were things we could work on. I also knew Mathias would have his back, that he would have his own guys go through the tape and gameplay to help Parker improve before the championship. This wasn’t the end of the world. It was just a small road bump.

“I couldn’t beat Creep. How am I supposed to be the best if I can’t beat him? How am I supposed to be the best when I mess up on stage? I get distracted by a flicker of light when my concentration is supposed to be steel.”

“Parker—”

“I’m embarrassed, Sydney.” His voice cracks, and my heart splinters with it. His eyes swirl with the force of a stormy ocean as he pushes himself to stand straight. “I told everyone I had this championship in the bag, but I don’t know if that’s the truth anymore. I’m scared. I’m scared everyone is going to think I’m a joke.”

“You’re not a joke.” I tentatively reach out and hold the tips of his fingers. “And this wasn’t the championship, Parker. It was one run.”

“One run that I lost. What if I can’t beat him? What if I lose the championship?”

“What if? You’re not anything less if you don’t win the championship. You are still one of the best. You are one of the top ten most-watched video gamers in the world, Parker. Creep and those others don’t even come close to you. Why are you putting so much pressure on this?” I squeeze his hands, begging for him to let me in.

“Because I told my grandfather I would win.” He pulls out of my grasp and walks back into the room, grabbing the water bottle and cracking it open as he goes. He sits on the foot and downs half the bottle before tossing it aside.

I know his family means the world to him; they are thick as thieves.

I shut the balcony door behind me and crawl onto the bed. He leans forward on his elbows, and his hand comes up to spin the hoops in his cartilage nervously. I kneel next to him and wait.

“I’m going to lose my inheritance.”

The words are spoken so softly I almost miss them.

“Not the whole thing but—” He flops back on the bed and presses the heel of his palm to his eyes. “God, Syd, I’d been so desperate to prove myself, and it seemed like such a smart idea. Now I just feel dumb.”

“What are you talking about?”

I wish I could read his mind, understand what is going on right now. I’m trying to read between the lines, but I don’t want to jump to conclusions. Not when he is in such a fragile state. I’m scared that I could break him when all I want to do is help him stay together.

He throws his arms out next to him and sighs.

“Remember that rumor a few weeks back? Before the Wyreless shoot.”

Parker tilts his head to the side to look at me. I nod, thinking back to the conversation we had.

“Turns out there was some truth in that tea.”

“Martin is trying to run you out of the company?”

Crap.

I should have looked into it more. What a rookie mistake on my part.

“Sort of.” He pushes up on his elbows and gives me a sad smile. It’s the worst expression he could have given me. “The entire board is trying to get rid of me.”

“What? Why? Because they want more control?”

“Well, it turns out you can’t be the heir to a company if you never plan to inherit it. The board doesn’t want me to keep my stake in the company if I’m not going to do anything with it.”

Oh. I mean. That does make sense, logically. But it doesn’t really make sense for them to take away his shares as a result.

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