Page 124 of A Stop in Time

On an exhale, my words are ragged, the truth of them lancing so deep. “I have more blood on my hands than any person should.”

I press my lips thin against the anguish threatening to spill free, because this is it. This is the moment of truth.

The thing is, I know what his reaction will be. I know how this will end. It doesn’t make it any less painful, but there’s no way in hell I could ever blame him for it.

“The hell are you talkin’ about?” Strong fingers nudge my chin up, forcing me to meet his probing gaze. Confusion colors his expression.

“I’m the one who killed your sister.”

Disbelief ripples over his features initially. When I don’t expand, shock bleeds into fury. Releasing me as if the mere contact has singed him, he steps back.

His brows descend in a punishing line. Voice low, it possesses a cutting edge. “You better fuckin’ explain. Now.”

With my fists at my sides, I force my voice not to waver. “A doctor has been manipulating my mind, Daniel.”

That muscle in his jaw flickers wildly, and he pins me in place with his arctic stare.

“He used drugs and mind manipulation. Brainwashing. My whole life is a lie.” My throat threatens to swell shut as I force myself to look him in the eyes. “He made me kill people.”

He doesn’t say a single word; he simply stares at me as though he’s facing a complete stranger. No affection or compassion is to be found in his eyes or features.

I exhale slowly. “When I started the self-hypnosis meditation, it opened parts of my mind they’d tampered with. The ones that were hidden from my conscious mind.”

A tumultuous assault of nervousness and fear swirls in the pit of my stomach, and my voice emerges sounding ragged. “I’m so sorry, Daniel.” I swallow hard. “I’m the one you’ve been searching for. I’m your sister’s killer.”

He staggers back as though I’ve attacked him, his features wrought with pain. Instinctively, I reach for him, but his face wrinkles in disgust, and I curl my fingers inward, dropping my outstretched hand.

All I can offer is a whispered apology. “I’m sorry.”

I know it’s futile. His expression darkens, turning thunderous, and he curls his lip in derision. “Sorry doesn’t fuckin’ cut it.”

He fists his hands so tightly, causing the skin over his knuckles to turn white. “You killed my sister.” His words sound as if they’re dragged from somewhere deep, drenched with agony.

I close my eyes, prepared to take whatever punishment he deems necessary. Because I deserve it.

“Don’t you fuckin’ take the coward’s way out.” He grits out the words. “You look me in the goddamn eyes.”

The moment I blink my eyes open, I know it’s over. Whatever he possibly felt for me once is dead and gone.

“I’m going to set things straight. I know it won’t bring your sister or anyone else back, but at least I can go there and stop him.”

An unidentifiable flicker crosses his face. “By yourself?”

I dip my chin. “Yeah.”

He stares at me like I’m crazy. “You think that’s smart?”

Tossing my hands in the air, I explode. “What the fuck else am I supposed to do? Just sit around and let him continue messing with my mind even more?” I shake my head. “I can’t let it keep happening. I need to stop this.”

Lowering my eyes to my spread palms, my voice grows softer. “However it ends, I’ll make sure he won’t be able to mess with anyone else ever again.”

“You’re just gonna march in there and take on some crazy-ass doctor?” His expression is incredulous, sarcasm clinging to every word. “Just how well do you think that’s gonna end?”

I do my best to stifle the anguish threatening to overflow and shove my hands in my pockets, averting my eyes. Resignation fills me with numbness, my words monotone. “As long as it all ends, that’s what matters.”

Heavy silence descends over us, and it’s so suffocating that I finally dart a glance at him. In this instant, when our eyes clash, he’s lost to me now. Lips thin with fury, those green eyes chill me through to the marrow of my bones.

My words pour out in a rush, each one ripped from the core of my heart and soul. “I’m sorry, Daniel. You’ll never know how sorry I am. Maybe in another life, we’d meet under normal circumstances. Our eyes would meet across a crowded room.”

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