Page 60 of Cage of Thorns and Blood

Mamma frowns. “That isn’t what we wanted from this, we wanted an alliance.”

I stare at her in dismay. “But he’s playing you, and me.” I don’t add again, but I’m thinking it. “You said, at the start, you said marry him and form an alliance and take over, well why don’t we just take him down?”

“How? Financially? What do you think?”

Is she asking me?

“Well, Mamma dearest, I don’t know. I have no clue what we could do to hit him financially because you guys don’t let me know anything!”

I’m fuming now. A kettle reaching boiling point on the stove. If only they would let me have some insight into the business, then maybe I could be more helpful. Sadly, I don't even know how many companies our family run. I know that there are the main core businesses, the ones that are mostly legitimate these days, and then there are the many small businesses they own. Our family has a plethora of sole trader type businesses, which is a great way of laundering money. It's kind of legal, and kind of not. Then there's the shady side of things, and of course, I don't know about that, and I don't wish to. When I say I want in on the family business, I mean the legitimate side. I have no interest in joining Nico and his thugs in shaking people down.

“Perhaps, if I had more insight into the business, then I could help you more,” I say to my mother. “However, in this instance I can't do much.”

“Yes, you can,” Babbo says. “You can go back there and get more information.”

“Oh, no way. I'm not doing that. You're sending me back into the lions den! He's going to know. He’ll be able to tell with one look at me.”

“Don't be ridiculous,” Mamma scoffs. “The man doesn't know you now, Renata. You aren’t the same as you were when you had a dalliance with him as a teenager. You can fool him. Why do you think I sent you in there? Renata, you think I’ve always underestimated you but I know exactly what you’re capable of. I know where your power lies.”

She doesn’t say the words, but she might as well. Between my legs is what she means. God, I’m going to vomit. She’s so unbearable.

I stare at them both and realize I need to play for time. I may have somehow overestimated my hand in this situation. A while ago I saw myself as the conquering hero who would bring two families down, but now I see myself as someone squeezed between two behemoths.

A horrible realization hits me. I'm incredibly vulnerable right now. If Matteo finds out I'm onto his game, I could be in danger from him. Certainly, from members of his family.

Oh God, I'm the nut in this scenario, and the Mancini family and the Andretti family are two sides of the nutcracker squeezing me.

I’m risking it all and for what? Two people I don’t even like and a man who is a psychopath? I almost laugh, except I’d probably scream instead. So I keep my mouth firmly shut and my face impassive.

The humiliation from my teenager years when I walked into that party to find him sitting like a king on his throne, surrounded by DeLuca’s washes over me as if it is all new. The photos of me scattered on his desk flit through my mind. That deranged drawing, the snake swallowing the heart. The poison eating the love. For the first time in a long while. I’m scared. I’m also angry. Raging. I let the rage win.

My father looks at me with such hard, cold indifference, and it sends a shiver down my spine. These people aren’t capable of real love and I am going to stop trying to win it. It’s a losing proposition and I am so damned tired of it all.

To buy myself time, I will string them along and then I will do what is best for me. Not Mamma and Babbo. Not Matteo. Me.

“How about, I take my time and try to do some more digging and find out all I can about his side of the equation, and you talk to your wayward son and demand that I know more information about our side of the equation.” I stare at my parents putting on my game face and trying to brazen this out.

The Andretti family are like sharks, and if they sense my weakness, they will attack. Any blood in the water at all will be a signal to them.

“That sounds like a plan,” Mamma says briskly.

“Good. I’ll book a date with him in a few days.” I smile at them, and their cool and aloof smiles in return let me know that they are both plotting and planning.

God, it wouldn’t surprise me if one day one of them killed the other. There’s nothing in their empty heads but hierarchies of power and their positions within them.

Fuck this shit; I am done with these people. What have I been fighting for? A piece of this? This broken, pathetic family? Fuck them. I am worth more. So much more. I have money. I have beauty. I can start over and build something for myself. I’ve been letting my insecurities win and that’s not me. Ever since I came back home, I’ve been letting that little girl who didn’t get the bike but tried so hard to be good come to the fore. Well, no more.

I stare at my parents, and the heartbreak I always thought would come at this moment simply isn’t there. They are hateful, vile people, and I feel nothing for them. Nico has Cindy and it’s my time to find my own happiness.

I can start a new life, and it’s something I should have done a long time ago. In Italy I’ll be safe from Matteo and his lies too but I won’t be going before I break him apart. I’ll show him he’s not the games master he thinks he is. I’ll make such a fucking fool of him, his reputation will never recover.

Before I go, I need to do something to really screw him up and show him he's not the games master he believes he is.

I leave my parents’ home with an uneasy sense of impending doom gathering over me like the storm clouds on a winter's day.

I’ve had four texts from Matteo demanding to know if I am alright. I fired off a reply and said yes, I was fine. I had to see my parents and I’m heading home because I still have a headache.

By the time I get home, I really do have a migraine.

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