Rereading our emails, I realize I might have come off a bit cocky. Maybe even a lot cocky. And pushy.
I want you to know this was never my intention, and I’d do anything to start with a blank slate.
Justin
A blank slate.
Last night, Justin wanted to start with a blank slate.
This morning, he sent me gorgeous flowers and the most touching note—though I’m not sure what he meant with his dark soul comment. Why did he send flowers? Did he think I was ignoring him after his emails? Is that why he escalated the apology?
Or did someone from Game Night give him an earful?
Did Haley say something to him?
That has to be it. Maybe she even wrote the note! Who knows? Why else would he talk about his dark soul?
I’m so confused.
When I click on the icon for his other email, I’m even more confused:
Chloe
I owe you an apology.
I want you to know I am deeply sorry for the hurt I caused you, and I’m ashamed of myself. I passed judgment based on who your family is. I of all people know how wrong and hurtful this must have been to you. I would do anything to take these words back if I could.
How can I ever make it right by you, Chloe?
Justin
My family? What’s wrong with my family?
Well, lots of things, but as far as Justin is concerned…?
It can’t be about his friggin’ rent again, can it?
So confusing…
Also, so much for email not carrying any emotion.
Is it just me, or are his emails highly emotional?
Or am I highly emotional just because it’s Justin?
The one thing I’m not confused about, is that I need to protect my heart. No jumping to conclusions. I’m the only one who made a whole thing out of Boston. He didn’t. When I brought Moose back to him the other night and he was having his Community Dinner—to which he did not invite me—he was all like, ‘Is this about Boston?’ like what happened between us was the most trivial thing.
God, I was so embarrassed.
Moving on.
I’ll shoot him a thank you email so I can cross that off my to-do list. I need to keep on keeping on with my life.
It takes me the longest time to figure out what to write, though. As much as I should not care and just get it over with, I can’t bring myself to hit Send, knowing Justin will be reading my words.
I may not matter to him, but what he thinks of me matters to me.
Go figure.