Page 107 of Never Let You Go

I shake my head, laughing at Logan and Hunter.

“You’re not missing out on much.” It feels to me that I’m missing out on a lot.

“Hey!” They both turn on their sister.

“Who picked you up drunk from that party your first spring break from college?” Hunter asks.

“Who covered the tracks in the snow under your window junior year of high school?” Logan asks.

Yeah, definitely missed out on a lot.

“Kids, enough,” Lynn says, but her eyes are narrowed on Haley.

“Mom! You know they’re lying!” Haley says, her fists on her hips, her eyes throwing daggers at her brothers.

Hunter and Logan leave the room, laughing.

“Hey! Come back here!” Lynn says. “Bring the food to the table.”

Dinner is ready, so I grab two baskets of bread and set them on the massive table, then quickly move away to find the bathroom.

When I come out, my eye is attracted to a gallery of family pictures on the wall. It’s a mix of birthdays and Christmases throughout the years, candid photos at the lake and on the slopes, graduations and other more formal photos. One of them catches my eye.

It’s an old, black-and-white photograph of a man. I feel like I’ve seen it before. The way a lock of hair falls along the side of his face. The tentative, lopsided grin. I rack my brain and come up empty.

I must be mistaken. I’ve lived vicariously through so many of my friend’s large family stories and paraphernalia, pretending that I was a part of these large, messy, happy bunches, that I’m imagining things.

I need to stop this and just enjoy what the present is giving me.

As I head back to the dining room, Emma is walking in from the cold. Caroline dashes in front of her, cuts me off, and throws herself in the arms of a man I do not know. “Daddy,” she cries as he hugs her. Emma smiles at me and joins the crowd.

I have to give it to her. She even has the co-parenting mastered. She has it together. I’m impressed.

Before I get too deep on how Emma is this perfect small-town woman and I’m a hot mess, Lynn calls out, “Sit wherever you’d like.” She pulls two chairs out and adds, “Alexandra sweetheart, come here.” She’s patting the seat next to her.

“Welcome to King’s Knoll Farm!” Hunter bellows from across the room. “Where you’re invited to act as you please, then told what to do.”

“Hunter! I just want to get to know Alexandra. Unless you wanted to? You can have her for dessert.”

“Mom!” Haley cries out. The room falls silent, then erupts in laughter.

Lynn giggles. “Oh silly, that didn’t come out right, did it? You know what I meant.”

I’m laughing and blushing at the same time and can’t help but glance toward Christopher. Emma is pulling up a chair to sit next to him. And he’s glowering at Hunter.

Craig seats himself on my other side. “I feel suddenly very important, seated between you two,” I say. “It’s intimidating.” I don’t know why, I feel comfortable opening up to Craig and Lynn.

“We’re really shielding you from this crazy bunch,” Craig says. “We want to make sure you don’t go running back to New York before you have a chance to know us.” He leans closer to me, pretending he doesn’t want Lynn to hear. “Although I’m not sure my wife is the best at this social thing. She tends to put her foot in her mouth, in case you hadn’t noticed.”

“I do not,” Lynn says, passing a dish of venison.

I’m seated across from one of their farmhands and his wife. He tells me they’re getting ready for sugaring season, and that I should come and check it out when they get started. A wail erupts from the kids’ table, and his wife jumps out of her chair, but Haley is faster than she is. “Stay right there, I got it,” she says.

“Thanks, Haley,” the man says when she comes back. Then, to me, “We had our first three years ago, and then twins a year later.”

“Didn’t waste time,” Craig chuckles.

“She’s exhausted,” the man says, circling his hand around his wife’s shoulders. “I’m not much help at home.”