Page 50 of Glad You're Here

I made my first choice the day I told my ex-wife that I no longer believed. All the choices that remained in my life would be mine.

I knocked on my boss’s closed oak door for our scheduled exit interview. I turned in my official letter of resignation a week ago, and he’d made several attempts since then to convince me to stay. I’d refused every offer with a smile.

The door swung open, and Tom greeted me with a heavy sigh. “Come in,” my boss of ten years said. He headed back to his desk and motioned for me to follow and take a seat. “I have to ask one more time: Is there anything we can do to get you to stay?” He let out a soft grunt as he lowered himself into his chair.

Nothing could make me stay. Nothing. Even if Thea hated my guts and didn’t want to be with me, I would have to leave Utah. Even if my family members adjusted their behavior and started respecting my beliefs, I couldn’t stay. The whole wide world called to me, and, as luck would have it, the most incredible woman I’d ever met did want me.

I smiled and stayed pleasant throughout the exit interview questions Tom had prepared. When he asked, “Is there anything we could do better on our end?” several thoughts ran through my head, but I said, “No. It’s just time for me to move on.” I’d learned that most people in my life didn’t truly want to hear how they could improve.

“Well, Brigham,” my former boss cleared his throat, reaching across his desk to shake my hand. “I hate to lose you.” When I shook his hand, his gray eyes settled on the tattoo that peeked from beneath my sleeve. I usually wore long-sleeved shirts at work, so Tom had never seen the tattoo before today. I got so tired of those lingering, judgmental gazes. “I hope you know what you’re doing. It doesn’t seem like the wisest choice to leave a job without another one lined up. The Lord gave us the gift of agency. Please be sure that you’re using it thoughtfully.”

I smiled and shook my head. “Tom, that crosses the line of professionalism. You are not my religious leader.” I stood, offered him a final wave, and exited his stuffy office. The grounds hummed with the excitement of the end of the semester, and the sun shone, offering promises of a new beginning.

I walked to my apartment and let myself in. My footsteps almost echoed in the empty kitchen as I pulled out another cardboard box. I loaded my mug collection, which had grown exponentially since I started enjoying coffee, and taped the box shut. I’d already sold my dining set, and some college kids were coming to pick up my couch and bedframe in a few minutes. The only things left to do were pack up my closet and drive to Durango.

The most delicious freedom and the woman of my dreams awaited.

Thea didn’t know about my new truck or the 5th-wheel trailer I’d purchased. She thought I was coming to visit and look for a place to live in Colorado. I was going to surprise her with the setup this weekend. We’d talked so many times about a life like this— one with no strings, no expectations, only freedom. We could travel the country in our trailer. Thea could paint with the most inspiring scenery surrounding her, and I could finish my graphic design degree online. We wouldn’t need tons of money. I still had quite a bit left from the sale of the house Gina and I had owned together, and Thea could sell one painting a month. I could teach a few classes at one of those fully online colleges if I needed to. They were always looking for qualified teachers.

It wouldn’t be much, but it would be enough.

I grabbed my empty suitcase and tossed in a pair of jeans and a few T-shirts. All the old plaid button-downs that Gina had picked out for me still waited in the back of my closet. They were shapeless and boring, and I hadn’t touched them in months. I selected a white one with baby blue stripes and slid it off its hanger. Gina bought it for spring photos with my family. I knew the framed picture still hung in my parents’ entryway beside the paintings of Joseph Smith and the Savior.

Would I ever walk through their door again? Would they ever meet Thea? See how I’d changed for the better? Would they ever notice that I had a different glow now, the kind you have when you want your life? They’d rather have me broken, sad, and standing in line to validate their beliefs.

I sighed and tossed the shirt into a box of stuff I’d donate that afternoon. It didn’t matter what my family thought or said about me. I was closing the door on the place I’d come from, but I’d leave it unlocked in case anyone wanted to follow.

When I’d finished packing and cleaning out my apartment, it was nearly 8 pm. If I left now, I’d reach Durango around 4 am. Would Thea be pissed if I woke her up that early? The thought of her moody little attitude made me grin.

I pulled up to Thea’s house at 5:13 am. I had to pound the coffee to stay awake all night, which required more bathroom stops than I’d planned. I desperately needed sleep, but I needed Thea more. All of the lights were off in her small rambler. I imagined her curled up in bed, not aching, sleeping peacefully.

I exited my truck and went into the trailer to set up one final surprise for Thea in the dinning area, then I made my way to her front porch. The sun hinted at rising by painting the horizon a warm orange. Even nature wasn’t as good of an artist as my goddess.

I knocked on Thea’s door, hating to wake her but selfishly craving the look on her face when I surprised her.

Her door creaked open. She looked adorable and perfectly fuckable in her tight black leggings and a black t-shirt with a skeletal hand flipping everyone off. Thea’s hair was piled into a messy knot on top of her head, and the smile she tried to hide was beautiful.

“Great. It’s another Mormon. When will you guys learn that no one wants your second Bible?” Thea closed the door in my face.

I laughed and yelled through the closed door. “Sister Traeger, I’d love to share a quick message with you about our Lord and Savior Joseph Smith — I mean Jesus Christ.”

Thea cracked the door open enough for me to see half of her face and the smile she wore. “Was Joseph Smith hot or something?”

“Very.” I nodded earnestly.

I cracked her. Thea burst out laughing and opened the door for me. “Don’t ever call me ‘sister’ again. That’s gross, considering what I’m about to do to you.”

She wrapped her arms around my neck and pressed her lips into mine. I kissed her back and slid my arms around her waist. “What are you doing here so early?” she said between kisses on her front porch.

“Are you mad about it?” I pulled her more tightly against my body and slid my tongue into her mouth. She tasted like chamomile tea and honey. She’d clearly already been up for a while. It must not have been a painless night.

“No.” She started to pull me into her house, but I stopped her.

“Wait, I have something to show you.”

Thea narrowed her eyes at me like she wanted to be annoyed, but she couldn’t completely hide the tiny sparkle of anticipation. She’d never admit it aloud, but she loved surprises and grand romantic gestures.

I took her hand and led her down the driveway to my truck and 5th wheel. She arched a brow and looked at me. “So, you wanted to show me that you’re homeless, jobless, and living in a trailer?”