Page 51 of Yes, Love

“Love you, too.”

Loving through the messy shit was actually pretty damn beautiful.

Twenty Six

Ava

I awoke to a frenzied pounding on my front door. My eyelids felt laden with cement as I blinked against the accosting afternoon sun. My head ached and spun, and every inch of my body felt sore and fatigued. Sometimes I physically felt the depression, like it leeched into my muscles to better hold me captive.

Yes, the depression was there, hovering over me like a dark storm cloud, whispering to me that I just… couldn’t. And as strong as I hoped I was, I couldn’t withstand the waves of despair that had been washing over me for the last few days. Maybe it all hurt ten times more than usual because I missed the shit out of Dominic. Maybe depression on top of heartbreak was too much for me.

The doorbell rang once, then twice. Like hell I was going to answer the door. I probably looked like death heated up in the microwave. No one was going to see me this way. I pulled my comforter over my head and ignored the incessant knocks.

After a minute, the knocks stopped, and I let out a sigh of relief. Then the unmistakable sound of a code being typed into my front door lock drifted up the stairs. Two beeps told me that whoever was on my porch was successful in their attempts to unlock the door.

“Shit,” I groaned out loud. Was it Jeanie? My mom? It better not be my mom. She promised me that she trusted me and believed that I was strong.

“Ava?” Sienna’s beautiful voice floated up the stairs.

Oh. It was Si. I could handle her, maybe.

“Ava!” Sienna’s voice grew louder and sounded slightly panicked. “Ava, babe, are you home?” Her soft footsteps sounded on the stairs.

I should get my ass up and at least brush my hair. But that was such a monumental task. I stayed put.

My bedroom door creaked open. “Aves?” Sienna’s voice was whisper soft and tight with emotion now.

Why was she acting all distressed? “Hey,” I mumbled from underneath my comforter. Sienna let out an audible sigh of relief and yanked the comforter away from my face. “Hey!” I snapped this time and covered my face with both hands. Sienna hadn’t seen me without makeup since high school.

“Holy fuck,” she breathed. “You scared me!” Sienna climbed under the covers and wrapped her arms around me from behind.

“Uh… what are you doing?” I glanced over my shoulder at her.

Sienna laughed. “Shh, you crazy bitch. Just let me love you.”

The corner of my mouth inched up, and a few of the clouds in my head started to break apart. It felt amazing to be wrapped up in my best friend’s arms, but she was definitely acting weird. “Why are you here?”

“Dom called me.”

My bruised and broken heart flickered to life and thudded against my chest. Dom called Sienna? About me? “Why?”

“He was worried about you, but he’s still in England and couldn’t come to check on you. Aves, why didn’t you ever tell me?”

My stupid heart beat a little faster. Dominic was worried about me. Shut up, heart. He had his Lucy now. He didn’t get to be worried about me. I turned to face Sienna. “Tell you what?”

Her gorgeous hazel eyes glistened with tears. “About the depression and what happened before you moved here.”

I blinked slowly back at her. “Wow, he told you everything, huh?” So much for keeping our little therapy session in Miami. Fuck him.

“Not everything. He just said, ‘Please check on Ava. She’s not answering her phone.’ I told him I’d stop by after work, and he was not cool with it. Then he sent me a link to the video you posted a few days ago. I hadn’t seen it because we’ve been so busy at the bar. I’ve hardly been on social media at all.” Sienna frowned and rubbed my shoulder.

“So I watched it and felt really bad that I didn’t know that about you, but again, I told Dominic I’d go right after work and check on you. He did this really irritated but kinda sexy groan and said, ‘Bloody hell!’”

I cracked a smile. I knew exactly what irritated groan Sienna was talking about. It was all I heard the first week that I knew him.

“Then he might have mentioned that he was worried you weren’t taking your meds and might want to hurt yourself. After that, I screamed at him and wouldn’t let him get off the phone until he explained why the hell he thought you were going to hurt yourself.” Sienna’s voice softened, and she locked me in her gaze. “He told me you’d been bullied and attempted suicide when you were fourteen.” She bit her lip. “Ava, are you taking your meds?”

I groaned and buried my face in my pillow, too tired to let fury fill my veins at Dominic’s breach of my confidence. “Yup. I’m not going to hurt myself.”

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