Page 95 of The Summer I Destroyed You

“You could get an injunction.” I swallow. I can’t believe I’m doing this. “It would keep the council from deciding anything while it was under consideration. Inspired Building fudged some of the reports to keep it from going before the historic preservation committee. You could argue that the reports were wrong.”

He presses his lips to the top of my head. “I’m still not going to, Em. This is what you want, and if you take anything from your time here, I want it to be that one person in Elliott Springs loved you enough to put you first.”

I freeze. He’s just said, more or less, that he loves me. He’s just said that he’s not stopping me, though he could. He worked on this for two years and now, on behalf of a girl he still doesn’t know all that well, he’s giving up his dreams.

When she’s the one who sabotaged those dreams in the first place.

My throat is clogged. It’s bullshit that he’s not going to fight me on this. It’s bullshit that he’s giving up what he wanted so damn badly just because he wants my happiness more than his own.

Only one of us can win, so it’s going to be me. Isn’t that what I told myself? And I said it assuming that Liam was thinking the same thing. But he wasn’t. Liam was thinking, “Only one of us can win, so I want it to be her.”

And it hurts.

“I have to go,” I whisper, rising.

“Now?” he asks.

I nod quickly. “I’ll be back.”

I grab my keys and phone and walk out while he’s still asking questions. And then I march toward the town while tears run down my face.

It hurts that he cares this much. It hurts that he’s not getting what he wants, that a building he loves is going to be destroyed because I want revenge—revenge on a bunch of former teenage idiots who had issues of their own, who probably don’t even care all that much about Lucas Hall. Not the way Liam does.

I find myself on Main Street. I don’t know why I’ve walked here—nothing but the diner’s even open this late, and it’s not as if I’d want someone to see me crying anyway.

The street is quiet and empty and I wish it were otherwise. Being in New York City was lonelier in a way—I could go through an entire day without ever speaking to another person—but I’ve never felt alone there the way I do now.

There is nowhere I deserve to go and no one I deserve to speak to, and that breaks my heart. Liam breaks my heart. Doesn’t he realize he could do so much better than me? How could he possibly care so much when I’ve done nothing but show him I’m unworthy of it?

“Emmy? Are you all right?”

Jeannie is standing in the alley next to the diner, smoking a cigarette.

Instead of the forced smile I’d planned to offer her, a sob emerges instead. “No,” I reply. “Not really.”

She throws the cigarette on the ground and stamps it out with her foot. “Oh, hon,” she says, throwing her arms around me. “What happened?”

“I sort of had a fight,” I reply, “with Liam.”

Her eyes widen. “With Liam? Didn’t know he had it in him.”

I choke on a weeping laugh. “You didn’t know he had it in him to fight? After what he did to Paul?”

“I didn’t know he had it in him to fight with you,” she amends.

My eyes close, and two large tears slide down my face. “He doesn’t,” I reply. “That’s what we fought about. He isn’t going to present his plan to save Lucas Hall on Friday. At all. He said it matters more to him that I get what I want.”

I press my hands to my face and cry, large, gasping sobs. I’m humiliated to be seen like this, but I can’t seem to help it.

“I don’t understand,” she says. “I think it’s sort of sweet.”

“I don’t want him to give up his dream,” I reply. “I don’t want to win by default. I wanted to win because I had the best plan. I think maybe beating him felt more impartial. If he’s not even going to try though…”

If he’s not even going to try, then he’s made a sacrifice on my behalf. Liam, who’s done nothing but give and wait for me, is just going to keep on giving, and I’m going to keep on taking.

“You’re tired, Emmy,” she says gently. “I have a spare room if you need a place to stay.”

I shake my head, no, but the question just makes me cry harder. I’ve never done anything to deserve her kindness or her care, yet she’s offering it to me anyway. Liam did, too, and I repaid him by stealing his dream away from him.

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