Page 126 of Creatures that Breathe

“Cross,” she returns, as if to say, stop me, if you don’t like it.

She kisses my jaw. “I dreamt of you.”

I freeze, look down at her like I’m seeing a mirage. I can’t imagine anyone ever dreaming about me. Remembering me beyond this plane.

“We were sitting in this adorable bistro, waiting for ridiculous overpriced fruity drinks and I got bored.” Her teeth locate the raging pulse in my neck and tug. “I decided to tell you everything I wanted to do to you and you did your little move.” She twirls her fingers at the sky. “Made everyone look away, and I stopped telling you and I demonstrated instead.”

The sheets pull back, and then she’s running her mouth down my chest, my stomach, lower. She looks up at me through pale lashes, the pinnacle of playful, of teasing.

“I want to go everywhere with you.” It slips out swiftly, like a blade after a trying day. Guts me.

Her smile is pure gold. “Let’s start with somewhere and branch out.” Her tongue flicks the valley of my hip, sends a shudder down my spine.

I throw my legs off the bed and stand, causing Leni to tumble backward. She laughs. “I didn’t mean now. Get back in bed.”

“I’m not leaving,” I return hoarsely. “But you can go anywhere.” I grab a shirt and pants from the dresser, blind to their color, their fabric. “You’re free. Give Draven my name.”

A brief pause. “I’m never talking to him again.”

I yank on my shirt, bile stinging my throat, heat searing the backs of my eyes. “Then write it in a note or send him my coordinates. Make it easier for me.”

“Cross—” Confusion crowds her voice. “What are you talking about?”

I stuff my foot into my jeans, toss a set to Leni, and dig for my belt. “It’s your first chance at freedom, a future. And Gods curse me again, I want you to be happy.” My voice croaks on the word. Happiness has hurt me better than I ever imagined it could.

I keep searching for my belt, push through my closing throat. “Visit a bistro, sit in the window and eavesdrop. Go to the beach. Make a city bend to your will.”

As I speak, the room seems to close in on me, the air heavy with the weight of the decision before us. Uncomfortable pressure builds in my chest, ready to destroy.

“I am not interested in waving,” Leni retorts stubbornly. “I don’t want to go anywhere else. You make me happy. I want to spend time with you. I want there to be us.”

I consider slamming my hand in the drawer. Over and over. I turn to her, keeping my expression flat. “Well, there can’t be an us, can there?”

Her mouth clamps tight. Intense stillness drifts over her body.

She’s in my shirt again.

My heart goes into painful overdrive, hammering my ribs. “Whenever we’re together, I end up on my deathbed, don’t I?” I growl, hands shaking as I scramble for my belt. “And if I prefer not to suffer eternally, then I need to be live in the realm’s shadows, answering for sins you didn’t commit.”

Her stare turns blistering, frosted ice glistening, threatening to melt. “But I …”

“You knew it would be like this,” I interrupt. Sorrow and resignation are lead weights on my shoulders. I turn away from her again. “You made the plan. Your parts over. Now it’s my turn to fight. And if you stay, you won’t be just collateral damage. You’ll be leverage I can’t afford.”

I hate how true it all is.

Silence eclipses us. The curse throbs, but doesn’t punish me for yesterday’s distraction, as if it knew all along, I’d hurt myself worse than it ever could.

Leni breaks the quiet with a whimper, “But … I love you.”

Every inch of my body coils taut. I’d rather take ten bullets to the chest than hear it. “You don’t. I’m convenient and I wasn’t the monster you expected. That’s it.”

“Cross.” She sounds wrong, quiet, and broken.

I slam the drawers shut, fuck the belt. “For the record. I loved our time together. As fleeting as it was.”

“No.” She’s angry, boiling up.

I wait for a threat. The kind of threat I’d have given a week ago. I’ll rip out your heart, haunt you all the way to Tartarus, delve inside your every atom, and ruin you with the taste of me.

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