Page 22 of Unforgiven

The girl was maddening. For the first time ever, he understood why their parents had given him so many chores. It had been an attempt to keep him out of trouble.

Unfortunately, trouble had still found him.

He hoped the same thing wouldn’t happen to Melonie.

9

Melonie Zimmerman was disappointed in herself. It wasn’t a good feeling and she wasn’t proud about it either. Especially since this sense of regret was kind of a new thing. Until fairly recently, she’d tried hard to be as close to perfect as she could get. It had been a foolish goal, of course. No one was perfect.

But now she realized that she’d also been very misguided.

Maybe that was a gradual development, or maybe the good Lord had decided to let her know that it was time she became a better person. Whatever the reason, she knew she needed to start doing things differently, even if changing meant that everyone else was going to be caught off guard. And, perhaps, be disappointed.

The fact was, she’d never done enough to try to get her parents to think more highly of Seth. She could blame it on her age, or that she’d been happy to be the “good” child. She loved her mother and father, but they had expectations. Sometimes unrealistic ones. When Seth was in prison, it had been so easy to let him take the brunt of their parents’ disappointment. For a while, it had even been a relief.

But now that she’d looked at her actions, she decided that taking the path of least resistance wasn’t good. So she determined to make a change. She was going to put on her boots, walk out the front door, and upset a great many people. Maybe she should care about that, she didn’t know.

All she did care about was that it was time to put her brother first. Past time, as far as she was concerned. She wasn’t going to stop herself no matter the consequences.

She was also going to put her future first . . . and that meant her relationship with Lott Hostetler. He was important to her. She knew their relationship was something special. She needed to have enough faith in herself and in Lott to push aside everyone’s misgivings about him and let Lott know that she was on his side.

Yes. She really needed to do all of that.

“Melonie, have you left for the market yet?” Mamm called out.

Startled, she looked around her. She was standing in the parlor, staring out the window. Daydreaming about being brave one day.

“Melonie, did you hear me?”

“Jah, Mamm!”

“Well, then, answer me, child.”

“All right. I haven’t left for the market yet.” Obviously. “I’m about to, though.” She glanced at the coatrack next to the door. Did she need a shawl? Or maybe she should go to her room and pull on her favorite navy blue cardigan?

“Why haven’t you gone? Do you need money?”

Ack. Her mother’s tone was sour now. Bordering on irritated. “Nee. I have some money.”

“Oh?” Her mother walked down the hall, glanced in through the doorway of the parlor. “Why are you in here?”

“I like this room. I decided I’m tired of only sitting here when we have company. And don’t tell me I shouldn’t be in here.” Inwardly, she winced. She could practically hear her conscience remind her that she’d just decided to be a better person.

Her mother folded her arms across her chest. “I wasn’t going to chastise you for being in the parlor. I wanted to know where you got your grocery money from.”

“Oh.”

Mamm tapped her foot. “Melonie, where did you get it?”

Her parents liked to pretend that Seth didn’t leave money in an envelope under their welcome mat once a month. She used to help them do that, but now she almost got an awful sort of rush knowing that it made her mother uncomfortable by bringing it up. Once again, shame coursed through her. She really did need to be better.

“Seth brought money when he came over yesterday.” And yes, she could’ve told her mother how much he’d brought, but some twisted part of her wanted to make Mamm ask. Just like she wanted to ask Mamm if one day she was going to acknowledge that the cash had come from her other child—and that she should thank him.

“I see.” She gripped the casing around the doorway. “How was your conversation with him? Did it go well?”

“It did.” It went as well as it could, considering he had been trying to dissuade her from seeing Lott. “Did you and Daed spend much time with him this time?”

Her mother inhaled. “Melonie, I think you should watch your tongue.”

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