Page 52 of F*cking Shattered

“Six hours,” he answers flatly.

I stand. “Let’s go.”

His eyes flash to mine, his eyebrows are drawn together, and his jaw is flexed with tension. “I can’t go out like this.” He lifts the bag of nothing but water now, showing me the tent in his boxers.

“If you like your little man you better. It says an erection lasting over four hours can permanently damage the penis.”

“What do you mean little? Look at this thing!” He raises his eyebrows indignantly.

I stifle back my laugh, knowing it will only anger him more. “Oh, I got an idea.” I rush around and grab my bag. I dig until I come up with a thin scarf. “Pull your boxers down.”

He rolls his eyes but pulls them down. I wrap the scarf around his thigh. “Okay, push it down against your leg.”

He does so and I wrap the scarf around it, tying it down. It tries to spring back up, but the scarf holds it in place. “There, now get your clothes on and let’s go.”

“I can’t stand up straight.”

“Why not?” I question.

“You try having your dick tied to your leg and see if you can stand up straight!”

I snicker but nod with understanding. “Okay, I’ll help you, sit down.”

He sits down and I grab his jeans and sit on the floor at his feet. “Slide your feet in.”

“You have them backwards.”

I look up at him. “A dare is a dare!”

His nostrils flair and he grounds his teeth together, but he allows me to put them on backwards.

I grab my purse and hold onto his arm, leading him to the car.

We get to the hospital a short while later and River tries turning around the second we’re inside and at the desk.

“What’s going on with you today?” the lady behind the glass asks as she takes in his backwards clothes.

“Umm.” He looks from me to her and then back. “Nothing. I’m fine.” He tries to turn again, but I grab hold of his arm and keep him in place.

“He accidentally ingested Viagra, and he’s had a litt— I mean, big problem for the last six hours.” I look over at River. “See, I didn’t say little this time.” I smile up at him as I nudge him with my elbow.

The lady behind the glass nods with wide eyes. “I see.” She slides us a clipboard of papers. “Please fill this out. The doctor will be with you soon.”

We don’t wait long before a doctor walks in and calls River’s name. We both stand but he stops and looks at me.

“Oh, do you want me to wait here?”

He offers up a sarcastic smile. “Yeah, it would be great if I didn’t have to listen to you laugh the whole time.”

“Completely understandable.” I sit back down and watch him walk away with the doctor.

* * *

A couple of hours later, River comes walking out. He’s standing up right, head held high and shoulders squared. “Let’s go.”

I grab my bag and rush behind him.

When we get into the car, I slide behind the wheel and start the engine. “So? What’d they say? What’d they do?”

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