Page 38 of Shattered

He rubs the light scruff on his jaw. “Um, she was diagnosed with lung cancer. She never was a smoker, but she waitressed in restaurants that allowed smoking and she worked in clubs and bars. She was always around it. I remember her coming home smelling of smoke so bad it burned my eyes when I hugged her.” His Adam’s apple bobs in this throat. I can see how much talking about this hurts him.

“I’m sorry for asking. You don’t push me to talk about Katie, I didn’t mean to push you.”

He pulls the hotdog out of the fire and places it on a bun. “You didn’t force me. I like sharing things with you. I just don’t want to give away all my secrets just yet and break the spell for you.” He smiles after quoting his words from before.

“Here.” He hands me the hotdog. “Let me know what you think about your first roasted hotdog.”

I take it and study it, making sure it’s not covered in soot or dirt or anything living.

“It’s not going to hurt you. Just try it,” he urges.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes to take a big bite.

“Without the teeth, that’s a nice image,” he jokes.

I lean over and smack him while chewing and swallowing.

“So?”

I nod with a smile. “It’s not bad.”

“Not bad?” He scoffs. “Just wait until you try the smores.”

“I’ve had smores.”

He puts another hotdog on the stick. “But have you had them made on an open fire, not in a microwave?”

“No, I guess not.”

“Did you spend your life under a rock?” he teases.

I laugh. “Kind of.”

We spend the rest of the night eating our hotdogs and smores which are amazing. I discover I like them much more than microwave smores. I love them burnt to a crisp: when the outer shell peels off.

I also learn more about River. He doesn’t realize this, but the more I come out of the shadows, the more he shows himself to me. The real him. The person he used to be, the reason he is the way he is, and I love him even more for it.

He pours a bucket of water on the fire before we crawl into the tent and below the sleeping bag.

The wildlife goes on around us. It’s relaxing hearing the crickets chirp and the soft sounds of the water rippling. The smell of the wet earth is all around us, mixing with the scent of the pine trees. River’s deep, rich scent mixes perfectly with our wooded surroundings.

I roll over to face him, and I place my hand on his angular jaw, tilting his head to the side to meet my stare. “Thank you for telling me a little about your life.”

He moves, placing his arm behind my head, bringing me closer against his body. “You don’t have to thank me. I’ll make you a deal.”

“What deal?” I look up at him wide eyed.

“Each time you mark something off your list, I’ll tell you something about my past. It might not be something big or dramatic, but just a memory or something that has affected me in some way.”

“Deal!” I move my mouth to his and he kisses me softly.

He slowly rolls us until I’m on my back and he’s on his side, facing me. His right hand runs down my arm, latching onto my wrist before he pulls it above my head.

He pulls his left arm out from under my head and does the same until he’s holding me down by my wrists. His lips find mine as he positions himself between my legs that are quivering with need for him.

“Are you going to hold me down?” I whisper against his lips while I move my hips against him.

“We’re in the wilderness now, princess. It brings out the animal in me.” His mouth covers mine as he demands entrance.

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