“Of course I do. You’re right. I guess he’s not like you.”

“Not at all. He’s a walking mimicry of my father,” Theo said. “Just take away some of the cunning and replace it with brute strength. We’ve never gotten along. We never will.”

It felt like Theo was chastising her for what she’d said, but Ren realized he was partly speaking for Dahl’s benefit. Distancing himself from his awful brother. Maybe something had happened during Thugar’s visit to the keep? She had a hundred questions that she didn’t feel like she could ask, so she settled on a more reasonable inquiry.

“Why did he come?”

Theo shrugged. “Why do you think he came?”

Ren knew the answer. An extension of Landwin’s desires. He would have been sent to speak sense to his brother. Let go of this random girl. Abandon this course, and we’ll bring you back where you belong. The fact that Theo was still in Nostra was a good sign.

“They seem very determined,” Ren said.

“And I am more than a match for them in that regard.”

He smiled, and a brightness filled the space between them. Across their bond. An emotion so pure that Ren could barely stand the way it felt. The way it coursed through the darkest parts of her heart, the emptiest spaces in her chest. She did not like the way it held up a mirror to her deepest desires—how it confirmed there was more to all this than pure strategy. This was a pleasure on the verge of pain. She was forced to look away. The intensity vanished, but the feeling did not entirely fade. Ren guessed it would never entirely fade. She liked him. It was as simple as that.

Which only made the presence of a guest even more awkward. Ren turned to Dahl.

“So, you’re new to Nostra? Who did you replace?”

“Sonya served before me,” Dahl answered, spooning a bite of soup. “She was quite old. She left to be with her grandchildren, but not before training me. I learned a great deal from her.”

“Meaning you weren’t a castellan before now?”

Dahl looked surprised. “No. There are only so many opportunities for someone as young as I am. I served as a housekeeper in my town. I hope you don’t think me above my station. I’m grateful for my position, my lady, and I work hard to make up for any inexperience.”

“That’s not what she meant,” Theo said, cutting in on Ren’s behalf. He looked surprised by Ren. She realized that she wasn’t playing her expected part. Maybe he’d assumed a kinship between them. After all, she’d grown up in the Lower Quarter. Her parents were from a lower station. If anyone could sympathize with a young, working-class girl, it would be Ren—not him. Dahl’s use of the term “my lady” only emphasized how Ren was coming off. She adjusted course.

“Merely curious. You seem quite capable.”

There was some friction across their bond. Theo clearly didn’t understand what was happening, and Ren was not sure how to make him feel comfortable. She finally turned back to him.

“You seem at home. Are you? Doing well here?”

A shadow crossed his face. Again, she managed to feel as if she’d insulted him.

“I am in exile.” He set his spoon down. “Away from the only city I’ve ever known. Away from friends. Away from my family. Away from you. No… I do not feel at home.”

Dahl was watching them. Ren felt the heat on her neck. All the things she wished she could say would be best said in privacy. Instead, she had to make her apologies in front of a stranger.

“I just meant that you’re in better spirits than I expected. I’m sorry, Theo.”

He waved the apology away. “I’m just tired. I can never seem to sleep enough up here. Who knows? Maybe I’ll get used to the cold one day.”

“Maybe you won’t have to,” Ren said.

She meant the words to be hopeful. Instead, that looming sense of disconnect yawned across their bond like an unexpected shadow. Ren could not determine its source and knew she would not find out more until they were alone. She resigned herself to eating her soup, tearing off chunks of stale bread. Time felt like it was crawling. The end of dinner could not come soon enough.

22 REN MONROE

Ren waited that night for Theo to knock on the door to her room.

Every time she shifted, the bed’s coils groaned beneath her. She waited for several hours before sleep took her. In the morning, she bolted upright. Squares of golden light were sneaking between the gaps in the blinds. Ren sat there, rubbing a sore spot on her side, trying to figure out why Theo hadn’t come. It was disconcerting. Was Dahl the reason for this change in him? Or had something been said during Thugar’s visit? Ren could not help considering the possibility that Theo might actually abandon her. It was possible that her arrival was simply making him feel guilty over a decision he’d already made.

Breakfast was meager. Boiled eggs, stale bread, dried meat. Ren saw Dahl out front through one of the windows, loading the sleds up with various goods, but there was no sign of Theo. She worked her way through the tasteless meal, hoping they might talk while Dahl was indisposed—but Theo’s arrival was perfectly timed with the girl’s return.

“How did you sleep?” he asked.