Page 48 of Hate Me

“She’s also… restrained.”

“Like an out-of-control animal?”

“That’s closer to how she is right now than you realize.”

“Shit.” He pinched the bridge of his nose and took a moment, then asked me, “Do you think you can help her? Like you helped me?”

“Is that what you want, sweetheart?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“Well, you hate her, don’t you?”

He narrowed his eyes. “You really want to test me with this right now?”

“I want you to get a handle on your emotions when it comes to her. Last time you went it alone and it didn’t work out very well at all.”

“All right, yeah. I hear you. I just… I needed to hate her. For my own sanity. Without closure, it was the only way I could look at it and not lose my ever-loving mind. I’m still pissed that she left, as well as her pulling away even before all that shit happened that night. I feel—”

“Betrayed?”

He nodded. “And like… like what I had to offer her wasn’t enough.”

“You loved her and she didn’t return it in the way you needed.”

“Fuck, Cas. Yes, dammit. I guess I did.”

There was no guessing about it, but at least he was admitting that much.

“Like you feel with Cal, yeah?”

“Yes. Like I do with him. Her too, actually. We brought her into the inner circle. But she was just struggling, Bastian.”

“You think we could’ve pulled things back from the edge with her if Jett hadn’t interfered?”

“I do.”

“And now? With her like you described?”

“Only time will tell.”

His brow furrowed. “Wait, you’re always sure about things. You don’t embark on any endeavor unless you’ve already determined the outcome, you’re always so many moves ahead.”

“Not always, but for the most part. In this situation, however, there are too many volatile elements with very little stability. Until some of those begin to settle, I can’t know, Bastian, I can’t see clearly.”

“Well, the first volatile element we can conquer is helping her out of this animalistic state.”

“I need Caleb for that.”

“Yeah, he is uniquely qualified.” He looked around. “I didn’t see him on my way in here. Is he asleep already?”

“He’s not here, sweetheart.”

“Excuse me? The one person we need to help Sky isn’t here where we need him?”

“He can’t do anything while she’s unconscious, can he?” I bit back with a lot more edge than I’d intended.

I’d barely spoken his name for the last two years, yet here I was speaking and hearing it—and even seeing him—several times over in a matter of days. It was a lot. To say the least.

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