Page 27 of Hate Me

“No.” He smiled. “That was solely his decision. All your achievement, sweetheart. My intent was to offer you a position in King’s real estate division, which is rapidly expanding, as you’re aware.” He laid his hand on my shoulder. “This is all you and I’m unbelievably proud of you.”

I smiled back at him.

But that faded all too soon as the subtext became apparent to me. “You don’t think I should rock the boat with dating again?”

“I think it’s easier to hate than to hurt.”

Our eyes locked.

His meaning hit home, hit fucking deep.

And I didn’t like it, not one bit.

I pushed off the bench and started shaking my head. “No. It’s not… that’s not… I’m not.” I glared at him. “You seriously think I’m still hung up on Sky? After all this time? I told you many times that I fucking hate her! All right? That’s how it is, all it is! You’re wrong. You’re wrong about this one, Cas.”

He rose to his feet calmly. “Then why this strong reaction, Bastian?”

I stilled. Dammit

“I… don’t know.”

“Then think on it. Don’t push it away anymore. Take some time with it, then come to me and we’ll discuss it further once you’re ready.”

All I could do was nod.

“Freshen up, then I’ll see you at dinner in half an hour after I’m done with Luke.”

“Yeah, okay, good.”

As he headed on out, I called out, “Are you, Cas?”

He stopped and asked over his shoulder, “Am I what?”

“Still hung up on her?”

Time ticked on by as he just stood there.

And then he turned his head and eyed me over his shoulder, his pain seeping into me, as he said, “I don’t usually concern myself with what could have been. I move forward, I have to. But in this case, her, the four of us… yes, it’s stayed with me.”

He smiled sadly, then walked out.

I slumped down on the bench and pinched the bridge of my nose.

“You can’t do this. You were all in. You’re part of this now, of us. You can’t just walk away.”

I’d been trying to cast out regret and move forward, just like Caspian was so good at doing.

But every now and then the raw truth seeped back in.

It’s stayed with me too, brother.

6

~Caspian~

I stepped out of Obscura and navigated my way through the hidden exit via a secret door in the sub-level that led to a parking lot a few blocks from the main building itself. It was an extra step the owners had taken for the clientele, knowing that a lot of us had certain public and professional images to maintain that didn’t mesh well with the depravities we indulged in at the elite private lifestyle club behind closed doors.

Depravities didn’t even cover it for me tonight. I’d had to go to extremes.