“My fortitude and my determination to follow my passions, that’s you with your career path. It might not be the same as yours, but those traits come from you.”
Her eyes lit up as I saw it actually sink in.
“Those are some of the most important parts of me, Mom.”
Emotion welled in her eyes, and she threw her arms around me again, holding me even tighter to her than before.
“I’m so sorry, sweetie.”
“I’m sorry too.”
She’d always worried that we hadn’t had anything in common, that everything about me had come from my dad and not her. But that day we’d both realized that there was also so much of her in me. And I hadn’t forgotten it since.
“You were also right about how I felt about Sebastian. It’s actually Caleb and Caspian too. It’s real what we have. Real, raw, and undeniable. And I’ve taken the leap. I’m beyond denying it and putting up walls. I’ve let them in and it’s been incredible. I just wish you were here to see things finally working out for me, to share in the joy of it all. And I wish you were here to fix what was broken in dad that night. Even I can’t reach him, Mom. I’m just hoping it’s a case of time for him, then he’ll come back.”
I sank onto the grass, the coolness of it soothing my bare legs in my little black dress.
And then I continued to talk to her, dispensing with the heavier stuff and focusing on the lighthearted moments of late, the goodness, the love, all of the positives.
By the time I ran out of things to say, darkness had fallen.
I rose to my feet, stroked my mom’s headstone again, then forced myself to step back and turn away.
Realizing I was done, the boys didn’t waste any time coming to me.
“Thank you for bringing me here. I needed it more than I realized.”
They wrapped me up in their arms, their care and love all over me.
I sank into it and let their closeness and comfort roll through me.
I finished towel drying my hair, then slipped on a pair of blue satin pajama shorts and a matching tank, the straps beautifully adorned with embroidered silver butterflies.
I hung the fancy towel up and sucked in a centering breath.
I’d needed the shower to soothe the emotional weight that today had turned out to be. Instead of shoving it down, I’d let myself feel it all in its entirety and processed it in the healthy way Doctor Granger had been teaching me to. As such, going to my mom’s grave hadn’t impacted me negatively, it had actually helped me. I was really glad that I’d gone. In fact, I was going to make sure I did it a whole lot more.
I stepped out of the bathroom.
And then I was pulling up short at the sight before me.
The guys were in my bedroom.
More than that, they were smiling at me as they lounged on the bed.
Caleb was leaning back against the headboard, his hands crossed behind his head with his feet up, dressed for bed in just his gray sweats, his sexy inked bare chest on display. Bastian was perched on the side of the bed in black boxers and a white tank. And Caspian was in his fancy mulberry silk pajamas.
“Well, this is certainly a sight to behold,” I commented, as I walked to them.
“Right back at you, darling,” Caleb said, eye-fucking me with every step I took.
That, combined with the three of them staring at me so intently and being on the bed, had a delicious wave of awareness rolling through me.
Caspian patted a space beside him at the foot of the bed. “We have something for you.”
“A present,” Bastian said, excitedly.
I gestured at my desk with the laptop and sketching equipment. “Haven’t you given me enough presents already?”