Page 9 of Shredded Soul

Quentin pulled out his phone and clicked around. Everyone stared at him. Charon felt the held breath in the room. Charon fully intended to find the guilty one for himself, except he couldn’t look away from Quentin. He saw the moment Quentin found the footage. A rapid blink was the only indication his heart had rejected what his eyes showed him. Charon saw him swallow. His chin lifted.

Snow’s face paled. “It’s not what you think. They threatened to kill you if I didn’t follow their orders. Everyone here was legitimately sold to you, except for maybe Paine. But they still think he’s dead. Charon hasn’t paid his debt. He’s the only person to ever survive running away from the academy. They won’t stop until his debt is paid. I had to keep you safe.”

Still, Charon couldn’t look away from Quentin. Every question he had about their relationship was answered in his expression. With his gaze locked on nothing, Quentin looked as if he had checked out. Charon’s heart ached. That feeling of having someone completely ripped away in an instant showed in Quentin’s eyes.

“Pack your bags.”

“Goddamn it, Quen. Try to see things from my perspective. It wasn’t personal.”

Quentin’s gaze finally moved to Snow. There was no describing his expression. It was hate and pain mixed with more hurt. “It feels pretty fucking personal.” With that, he rolled himself away until Paine hurried after him to help.

Everyone filed out without looking back. There was a dark undertone and some rumblings about how they should have known. No one directly confronted Snow. Charon kept his seat in the corner. His gaze never wavered from Snow. He saw what he saw, and he couldn’t unsee it. Snow genuinely loved Quentin. He was every bit as crushed as Quentin. Sometimes, life wasn’t fair to anyone.

With everyone else gone, Snow focused on him. “They threatened to kill him. What would you have done?”

“Probably exactly what you did.” His voice sounded like he had swallowed glass. Charon cleared his throat. “But the right thing would’ve been to come to me and let me handle it. They haven’t killed me in ten years. Why do you think that is?” Charon didn’t wait for Snow to answer. “It’s because they fear me and what I can do. Nothing would’ve happened to your man. Unfortunately, all the academy taught us is betrayal. Ten years later, you’re still their bitch.” Since Charon couldn’t do anything worse to Snow than what he had done to himself, he headed to Quentin’s room. He was the real loser in all of this. That was a fucking shame.

Paine helped Quentin into bed. It was like he was dead. He simply let Paine take care of him while he disappeared inside his mind. The pain was so real and thick. Paine felt like his heart might cave. Every ounce of hurt he felt was for Quentin. Quentin hadn’t known this level of betrayal before. Paine always expected it was right around the corner.

With Quentin settled, Paine crawled into bed next to him and held on. Quentin’s skin felt like ice. Paine dragged all the covers over him and went back to holding him. He rubbed Quentin’s arm, trying to warm him. Quentin stared at the ceiling without blinking. He was shattered. Paine recognized the signs. He saw it too many times in the mirror.

Charon came into the room. Paine glanced over his shoulder. Charon’s expression froze his blood. He was the man who had tortured Paine. Unintentionally, Paine’s teeth chattered.

Then Charon bent and kissed his cheek before touching his lips to Paine’s ear. He spoke softly, keeping his words for only Paine’s ears. “You’re right. You have Elizabeth Taylor eyes, except yours are more beautiful. I looked her up the moment I had access to the internet. No one has the same gorgeous purple eyes as you.”

“They’re violet.”

A soft, sexy rumble of laughter caressed his ear. “I love you.”

Paine’s eyes closed. His throat swelled. He knew. Charon planned to leave him.

“If I don’t come back, know I lived for you.”

Paine wanted to grab two handfuls of Charon’s shirt and beg him. No amount of begging had ever helped him. Everyone who should have killed him refused. Everyone who claimed to care about him hurt him.

Charon straightened.

“No.” Quentin’s ragged-sounding denial surprised Paine. His gaze shot to Quentin. Quentin’s gaze moved Charon’s way. “Whatever you’re thinking, no.”

Charon didn’t soften. “I have to take care of this, or they’ll keep coming.”

“I’ll buy your freedom.”

Somehow, Charon’s face hardened even more. “I am free. I’ll be damned if anyone believes otherwise.” Charon’s gaze moved Paine’s way. Their gazes met and held. It felt like an entire lifetime of conversations passed between them. Then he walked away.

Quentin covered his face and crumbled. The cries that escaped him were as familiar to Paine as breathing. All he could do was hold Quentin while he released the helpless rage. So that was what Paine did. He held Quentin until the final sob left his body. Quentin simply went limp.

Minutes passed, Paine thought to check if he was asleep. Quentin spoke, saving him the trouble. “I want to be a cat too,” Quentin whispered, breaking Paine’s heart.

Paine nodded, squishing his face against Quentin’s chest. “Okay. I’ll build you one of those wheel rigs they make for a cat, so they can still run when their back legs are paralyzed.”

A watery chuckle met his claim. Quentin fell silent again for a moment before breaking it. “Why didn’t you tell me about Charon?”

Paine measured his words, since even he wasn’t sure why. “I’ve never known how to explain how I still love someone with every fiber of my being who did the most unspeakable things to me. He should’ve killed me. That would’ve been a kindness. But the thing that enrages me to my soul and keeps me up at night is, I would’ve made the same choice he did. I could never take his life. He is the other half of me. The choice he made meant a chance at us surviving together.” Paine swallowed. “I’m just not always sure how much is left of me.”

“Every one of your therapists has said you’re completely sane.”

Paine chuckled. “You realize I went to the same academy as everyone else here, right? Every single one of us was trained in how to pass any mental health test. I learned how to silently kill and then disappear. There’s nothing Charon can do, I can’t. The only thing they couldn’t teach me was how to not feel. That’s because of Charon. He kept something alive in me.” Paine’s mind shied away from those days. “That made his torture so much worse, and they knew it.”