Page 82 of Her Summer Hope

He’d bring her up every day if it put that look on her face. She closed her eyes, and just for a little while, she slept and he watched. He watched over them as if they were his own.

Maybe he could pretend they were, just for a little while.

∞∞∞

Kyle was up before dawn the next day with a cup of coffee and his thoughts.

Maddy was unlike any woman he’d ever known. She was responsible. She was kind. She was thoughtful. She was forgiving. She was funny. She was a great mom. She was gorgeous.

He swirled the drink and watched the dark liquid slosh against the sides of the mug. He felt a fist squeeze his heart again as he remembered the shock of seeing her struggling on the floor, looking violated and roughed up—of seeing Murdock standing with Jace at the end of his fists, a second away from death.

A black rage had welled up inside him so encompassing, that he blocked everything out except the way Maddy’s face looked, the way her skirt had been shoved up her thighs showing too much skin, the way Jace had paled, the way Murdock had gone cold and vacant.

It was all jumping out at him again and had throughout the hours of the night. It was all tangled up with the extreme elation he’d felt when they’d hiked together last Saturday. He had flashes of her sleepy smile as she looked up at him from her place on the blanket, her laugh as he joked about the food, her tenderness with Em.

He wanted nothing more than to hold Maddy in his arms. He needed to know that she was okay, that she was safe, that she was happy…he needed her and that scared the hell out of him.

People were fragile. They left. They got hurt.

They died.

Maddy was just as vulnerable as anyone else to those things, and it made him almost freeze up with anxiety. He knew what it was to lose people. He couldn’t imagine having her and then losing her.

He tapped his fingers on the table as the sun gradually came up and Jimmy startled rattling pots. He needed to figure out how to stay in control, and how to keep his distance from Maddy without hurting her. He needed to remember that she was taken, and he was ashamed to admit—even to himself— that was starting to bother him less than it used to.

Murdock must be rubbing off on him.

He scrubbed a hand down his face, feeling the two days’ worth of stubble and deciding not to shave again until he had to.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Jimmy asked, setting down a plate of waffles and sausage in front of him. It looked delicious, but he wasn’t hungry. Not even a little.

“They’re worth quite a bit more than that this morning,” he said quietly.

He heard the guys moving around the house. Wyatt was probably sniffing out coffee and a hangover cure. John had been conspicuously absent much of the time and Kyle had a feeling something big was going on with the man. Murdock was the same as ever.

Aiden was making progress, and Jace…well, he still needed to talk to the man. He’d started avoiding everyone again and he had a terrible feeling that it was his fault—his and Murdock’s.

He ate a little and took his coffee to the sink before leaving the kitchen without a word. He bounded up the steps and was about to knock on Jace’s door when the man himself came out of Aiden’s room.

“Jace, can we talk?”

Jace, looking somewhat apprehensive but nodding, followed Kyle to a quieter part of the hallway, then out onto the top balcony. The early morning light filtered through the sky, casting a soft glow around them.

Kyle took a deep breath, his thoughts racing as he prepared to address the misunderstanding.

"Listen, Jace," Kyle started, his voice steady yet imbued with deep sincerity. "I need to apologize. That thing in the pantry with Maddy... I jumped to conclusions. I thought the worst, and I was very wrong."

Jace's eyes, which had held a guarded look, softened slightly. He shifted his weight, looking down at his feet before meeting Kyle's gaze again for only a moment. "It's okay, man. I get it. Things looked bad," he said, his voice low but not accusatory.

Kyle shook his head, the weight of his mistake pressing down on him. "No, it's not okay. I should've known better. You were helping her, and I... I let my anger take over. I was out of line, and I'm sorry."

There was a moment of silence, the air thick with unspoken words and emotions. Jace finally nodded, accepting Kyle's apology. "Means a lot, hearing that from you."

"I let my emotions get the better of me," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "It's not the example I want to set here."

Jace shifted, crossing his arms. "We all have our moments, Kyle. You've seen some tough stuff. It messes with your head."

"Yeah, but that's no excuse. I'm supposed to be the one keeping it together, for everyone's sake." Kyle's eyes were distant. "You've been through hell, Jace. You don't need me adding to that."