Page 14 of To Crave Truly

My head was yanked backwards, disconnecting me from Mordecai’s neck. A snarl ripped itself from my throat at the rough treatment. Then, as if two invisible forces were pulling us together, our mouths collided in an explosion of fury. It was a kiss of war. Of teeth and tongues. Each of us wanting to claim victory over the other. The sounds we made were animalistic, all grunts and groans, as we tasted each other, fought with each other. My brain had clearly fled because my body was pressing against him, revelling in his firmness. He swelled beneath me and let out a low, guttural groan.

Realisation hit me like a slap in the face. One that I most definitely needed.

I pulled away and scrambled off him.

What the hell was that?!

My chest was heaving. My breaths were short. My head was spinning, and my body was humming with... Fuck. Everything.

Guilt.

Lust.

Shame.

Need.

Mordecai stared at me with fascination. Almost like he couldn't believe his own response.

"Well, that was... interesting," he said softly. He ran his tongue along his lips as if he was licking the taste of me from them. I shouldn't find that hot. But it was.

A whimper escaped me, and he growled again, his fingers flexing on the arms of the chair that were no more than splintered wood now.

"You need to leave." His voice was menacingly low. "Now."

I didn't need to be told twice. I fled the room, leaving the chaos of the moment behind me. I was so confused right now, and I needed to get away from Mordecai's influence. I needed to figure out if what I'd just done was the result of exchanging blood, or because of something scarier. Like the fact that I might actually like the guy.

Chapter Seven

Alec

My heart thudded heavily in my chest. I still wasn't used to the sensation of it constantly beating. To the continuous thud that echoed loudly in my ears. It had been so long since my heart had resided in my chest, that I was more used to it not being there. I'd refused the Witch Queen's advances many years ago and as a reward, she'd cursed me to walk the earth without my heart. But thanks to Lori and a deal she made, the Witch Queen had to put it back where it belonged. I just couldn't seem to make sense of anything that I was feeling. Everything just felt extreme. Like now. I was anxious. Fretful. We had come back to the Conclave after Jasper's attack and Lori's kidnapping — not that it looked like kidnapping when she seemed to have gone willingly— and everyone was looking to me for answers. I had de Santis breathing down my neck, demanding to know how Jasper could have turned on us, Octavius Crowe, Fenris' father, and an Arch Mage, wanting to know where his precious Shadow Mage had gone, and the rest of the team needing to know what to do next. And on top of that, I was learning how to feel emotions again. Not going to lie, I was all over the place.

"She didn't go willingly!" Fenris roared. "She's clearly being manipulated."

"I should have been there," Cassian snarled, his bright ice blue eyes darkening with his anger.

Saskia shook her head, her flame coloured curls bouncing with the motion. "This really isn't helping."

I needed to get a grip on the team, or this was going to descend into a bloodbath.

"Guys!" I shouted, grateful that they all shut up immediately. Three sets of eyes spun to face me, and a deafening silence descended. "Arguing among ourselves isn't going to solve anything. Yes, Lori is missing under questionable circumstances, but that doesn't change the fact that she has been taken. We still haven't solved the mystery of the missing witches, or why the mages are being used. We need to focus on that for now."

We still needed to discover why the angels were using witches to control the mages. The current theory was that one of Lucifer’s own creations couldn’t destroy him so Camael, the angel protector of the Upper Realm, was somehow getting the witches to control the mages to destroy Lucifer and anyone who stood in their way. There was also the fact that Violette, the Witch Queen, had sacrificed some of her witches for what she thought was the greater good. She'd told me that at the Yule Gathering, blatantly said it to my face, that the sacrifice of a few outweighed the loss of the whole. We needed to get more out of her, but she'd gone to ground in Strigavallis after Mordecai's attack. Well, Jasper's attack. He was the one that attacked us all at Mordecai's request. Whatever hold the original vampire had over Jasper was stronger than the Sirebond that de Santis had over him. I'd been shocked to learn that. I had never known that about Jasper, that he was working for the vampire who had sired him. It just went to show how little we all really knew about each other.

My heart clenched. Was that sadness? Was I sad that I didn't know enough about my teammates?

“Is there any word from Rae yet?” Saskia asked interrupting my thoughts. A concerned frown sat above her cornflower eyes, and she twisted her fingers together in agitation.

Rae, Lori’s best friend, and a powerful witch, was still trying to find a witch willing to talk to her about the ones going missing.

“Not yet,” I replied solemnly. "We just need to hope that— Fuck!"

Black shadows unfurled in front of me, and Torsten popped into existence. I hated when he did that. Ever since getting my heart back, his random appearances made me jump to high fucking heaven.

"Forgive me for arriving unannounced." A smug grin spread across his face. Yeah, right. He didn't want forgiveness. The guy enjoyed making me jump way too much. "I thought you might like to hear the news from the Under Realm."

"Of course." I really hoped Lucifer had a plan because I was struggling to come up with what to do next and that terrified me.

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