Page 69 of To Crave Truly

“I’m just getting a sense of who you are. The last time we met, you weren’t a vampire. I’m figuring out if that’s changed your magic.” He cocked his head to one side. “So far, I don’t sense any other change.”

It had been some time since we’d seen each other, and I’d almost forgotten how sharp his features were. He was very striking, and he kind of looked like he’d cut your heart with a spoon if you pissed him off.

“That’s good, isn’t it?”

He shrugged. “Not sure. Can I try something?”

“Sure.”

“You’re very quick to trust,” he said with a raised brow.

“Not really. I’m just betting your curiosity about my magic and me being a Shadow Mage outweighs any harm you might otherwise consider.”

He barked a laugh and stepped closer. “Probably. Hold out your hands.”

I did as he asked, and he wrapped his hands around my wrists. His fingers were rough against my soft skin. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. Electricity hummed in the air as I felt the soft caress of his shadows wrap around my forearms. They felt as soft as silk as they moved up my arms, but I knew how deadly they could be if Edwin wanted them to be. Just like I’d willed mine into a blade to hurt Mordecai.

I could feel a tugging sensation beneath my sole plexus.

“That’s just me,” Edwin said softly. “Close your eyes and feel for your magic. Try and wrap your shadow wisps around mine.”

I reached down into my core, searching for the magic that I knew was there. I’d had a rocky relationship with my magic, from not understanding it, to starting to master it and then losing it. I’d felt that loss keenly. Strange how it was only after losing it that I realised how much I yearned for it. And now it just felt like it was continuously slipping through my fingers.

I groaned in frustration. “I can’t do this.”

Edwin clutched my arms tightly. “Yes, you can. You were born for this, Lori. Don’t let fear stop you. Try again.”

I searched inwards again, but my magic was just out of reach. “I can see it, but I can’t get to it.”

“You can do it.”

Pain lanced through my skull as I reached harder for it, but it still proved elusive. “Fuck.”

Edwin let me go when I pulled away. I paced the room in agitation, my annoyance fuelling my self doubt and making me growl.

“This is pointless and stupid and—”

“Hey,” Edwin snapped, and I stopped in my tracks. “Give yourself a break. You’ve been through the greatest pile of shit but you’re still here. I believe you will master this.”

“Why?”

“Because you have me as a teacher and I’m awesome.” His smile was wide and cocky, his eyes shimmering with mirth.

I snorted. “Modest, too.”

“Damn right.” He walked over to me. “Now, let’s try this again. Stop trying to reach for it, let it come to you.”

“Okay,” I said as I held out my arms and took a deep breath. “I’m ready.”

He grasped my arms again and his magic slithered along my skin, familiar and welcome. This time I let the sensations wash over me like a cool breeze, settling beneath my skin and becoming part of me. Instead of reaching for my magic, I let Edwin’s tempt it out of hiding.

A coolness unfurled in my core sending a shiver traipsing up my spine. I closed my eyes and sank into the sensations. I imagined my magic as a black curl of smoke, surrounding my arms and reaching for Edwin, tangling with his magic until it swirled and moved like a snake.

“Open your eyes,” Edwin whispered.

I did as he said and gasped. It was just as I’d pictured. My magic was slithering around Edwin’s, twisting and turning and shimmering as it moved. “Whoa.”

“See. Told you that you could do it.”

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