Page 90 of The Summer of ’98

We left Noah and the others to chat, their voices becoming quieter as we entered the kitchen. Despite being in another part of the house, we still had to keep our volume down if we didn’t want to be heard. The walls were thin, and unlike the Laheys’ home, we didn’t have a lot of space to create distance.

“Cass, what’s going on with Noah?” I interrogated her as I opened the fridge and began to retrieve different produce for sandwiches.

She lifted her slim frame onto the lip of the countertop and sighed. “We’re just . . . arguing.”

“I can see that,” I said. “About what?”

“Coming here from Castle Rock, I’ve seen how far I’m going to be from Noah when he starts college at Baylor. I dunno. I felt a little . . . upset about it?”

I mulled over her words as I sliced a tomato into small cubes and threw them into a serving dish. “I mean, it’s his college choice. You can’t get mad at him for going to college, Cass.”

She pressed her lips into a tight line. She knew that I was right.

“Come with him?” I suggested. “Or do long distance. It wouldn’t be the end of the world.”

“I couldn’t do long distance.” She shook her head as she stared down at her fingers twiddling in her lap. “Not with him.”

“How come?”

“It’s him,” she said. “He’s devious and college girls would be all over him.”

“You don’t trust him?”

“Would you?”

“No,” I said. “But I wouldn’t date someone that I don’t trust either.”

Her shoulders slumped in obvious disappointment. I hated to be the bearer of bad news. But she needed to hear it. I wasn’t going to coddle her and support a relationship she wasn’t comfortable in. If she was happy and had no second thoughts about the commitment, then I would be thrilled for her. But that wasn’t the case—that much was obvious.

“I can’t go to Baylor anyway,” she said and tucked a leg under her bum. “I’m not smart enough. Senior year is already way hard, and it’s only just started.”

“It’s all about your attitude.” I gave her a bop on the nose with a cucumber. “You have to work with your circumstances, and any situation is as good as you make it.”

She tilted her head to the side and fixed me with a bored expression. “You do remember having a full-blown meltdown when you found out that you were pregnant, right?”

I laughed and handed her a carrot and the grater. My kitchen skills hadn’t improved much, but I could prepare vegetables.

“Yes, I remember having a meltdown. But I’m making lemonade with lemons. I’m choosing to embrace and be grateful.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” she mumbled and hopped off the countertop. “Your boyfriend worships you and his mother can’t wait to be a grandma. It’s easy for you.”

“Cass,” I turned to her with a soft sigh. “I haven’t spoken to my mom in a month. She hit me and wants nothing to do with me. I mean, I’m so fortunate to have the support that I do, I’m not taking any of that for granted. But it’s still been hard.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, her cheeks a shade darker than her natural blush. “That was insensitive. I think I’m projecting. It’s not your fault.”

My heart hurt for her. As it did when it came to Noah—she deserved more. But unless she was willing to make a change, then I couldn’t help her. Those choices were her own.

“How are things with your mom?” I changed the subject, though it might not have been a less painful one.

“The same. She wasn’t even home on the first morning of school. Senior year and she was out. Not that I’m surprised.”

“Where was she?”

“At her new boyfriend’s.”

“Another new one?”

Cass gave a small exhausted nod. “He’s okay. He’s nice, I guess. I’ve learned not to take my frustration out on them. It’s not their fault my mom is a deadbeat.”

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