Page 37 of The Summer of ’98

He shrugged and stood up. “Let’s do it, then.”

We arrived at our local arcade a half hour later, pushing through the glass swing doors to find the place crammed with kids and friends from school. As always, it was dark but there were flashes of bright neon coming from all of the machines lined up together. The sound of coin slots, pings, and the low humming whir of pixelated characters jumping across the screens was loud. The six air hockey and foosball tables were clattering and there were cries of excitement coming from the game of hoops.

“I didn’t bring cash,” Noah said, standing beside me while we looked around.

“I’ve got it. Should we get some tokens?”

“I guess.”

We went and paid for a bunch of tokens from the front desk and proceeded to walk around in search of something free. I doubted that we’d find a machine that wasn’t being used, so we hopped in line for the racing game and waited our turn.

“Where’s Ellie?” Noah asked over the noise.

“With Cass.”

“I think Cass is still pissed about what happened with Holly. When she came over this morning, she wouldn’t even talk to me. Said she only wanted to see Ellie.”

“Weird that she’d be mad about you hitting it with another girl.”

Noah sensed my sarcasm and frowned. It was our turn to use the racing game, so we slid into the seats and deposited our tokens, gripping the steering wheels while it counted us down.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” he said. “I can do what I want.”

We both put our foot down on the accelerators and steered through the virtual racetrack, competing to stay ahead of each other. He had an inarguable point. Not that there was ever a point in arguing with him anyway.

“I never said that you can’t do what you want. I’m just not surprised that Cass is upset. You know what she’s like. You know that she wants more from you.”

My car pulled in front of Noah’s, cutting him off. He cursed. “Too bad, I told her it’s not happening.”

“Why not, though? If you’re going to keep chilling and sleeping together, why not just go out with the girl?”

Noah’s car was gaining speed again and came barreling up toward the tail of my car. “Do I question why you can’t just be single and fuck around? No.”

“You sort of do.”

“Whatever,” he sideswiped me and I had to steer through a spinout. “Is it so weird that I like keeping my options open? That I enjoy variety? Sue me if being tied down to one girl doesn’t sound appealing to me. I’ve got my whole life to be a boring sack. Mom was single until she was in her thirties, bro. Worked just fine for her.”

“Okay, fine.” I steered around a corner and found Noah just around the bend. The finish line was approaching, and I pressed even harder on the accelerator. “That’s your business. Cut it off with Cass, then. She doesn’t feel the same way, dude. Stop stringing her along and end it so she can move on.”

At the last stretch, I pulled ahead, passed Noah, and came in first place. He exhaled and we both quickly vacated the seats so that the next people in line could take their turn.

“I’ve tried to end it,” Noah said. “She’s still my friend, though. I don’t want to lose that. It just happens. We end up in bed together because . . . I don’t know. Everything else is there. I’m not interested in having a girlfriend. Casual sex is fun.”

We walked through the arcade, mindful of lines and smaller kids weaving through the crowds. I didn’t say anything because there wasn’t much that I could say. If that was how he felt, that was his business. How Cass came out of all this was a concern to me, but if she wouldn’t listen to Noah when he tried to abstain from her, then she wasn’t going to listen to me. She loved him so much and that made me sad for her.

“You’ve had girlfriends before. What about Anna? You two were dating for like six months in sophomore year.”

“Then she slept with Kendrick while I was standing outside of her window in the rain because she’d told me to come over and sneak in.”

“What? For real?”

“Yeah. Told me to sneak over and I was waiting for like twenty minutes in the rain and I was like, screw this, and scaled her house. When I looked through the window, there she was with that asshole.”

“Shit,” I said, slipping my hands into my pockets. “I didn’t know about that.”

“Nah, I didn’t even care, wasn’t worth mentioning.”

But it was worth mentioning. It had to have hurt him. Maybe that had some part to play in his aversion to settling down. But then again, perhaps he really did just prefer casual arrangements. It was hard to tell with Noah. We saw a couple of kids ditch a foosball table so we took their place and put the tokens into the slot.

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