Page 14 of The Bachelor

Though if she was honest with herself she’d been more in love with the idea of moving to Nashville than in love with Ben.

She had also been too concerned with maintaining an ideal of celibacy that she hadn’t believed in for years. She was grateful that she hadn’t lost her virginity when she was too young to know herself and what she wanted. Also that it hadn’t been Ben, who had obviously thought so little of her. Now though, she wanted to make a clean break. Not wallow in hurt and anger. Just move on. Let the wind blow her past off of her so she could start fresh.

It was almost funny when she thought about it. After eight years of never doing anything remotely crazy, determined to not get into any scrapes, she’d wound up in a mess anyway. Being Ben’s perfect girlfriend had gotten her exactly nothing. Now here she was on the back of a bike with a man she didn’t even know, yet she felt totally at ease with him. If he hadn’t shown up, she wasn’t sure what she would have done. Borrowed a phone in the diner? Waited for Ben, gotten her purse, cried herself to sleep in her hotel. She didn’t feel like crying anymore, though she couldn’t guarantee that would hold. She might be sobbing later for all she knew, especially when reality set in.

She wasn’t going home to Kentucky. That wasn’t going to happen. She would only do that if she were completely homeless, out of money, starving. She had enough money saved to find a place with a roommate, and surely in a tourist town there would be a job waitressing or in retail. She would be fine. So she relaxed her shoulders, gripped Shane tighter, and reached for peace. Practical matters weren’t the issue. Her heart was going to take some time to sort out because mostly she was mad at herself for not listening to her own wants and desires.

Shane pulled in front of a large brick building and she realized it was the hotel she had booked. The one she had thought might impress Ben. She pictured the way Shane had looked at Ben, like he was a bug beneath his boot, and thought about why she had been attracted to Ben. Maybe it wouldn’t make sense to someone else, but she had cared about Ben ever since he had reached his hand out and picked her up out of the dirt after a boy had shoved her down in the seventh grade.

When had Ben become the one who shoved her down though? She wasn’t sure, and she was angry and sad with herself for not realizing it. The shift had been subtle, but she shouldn’t have been so focused on getting herself to Nashville that she ignored the difference in the way Ben treated her, all the changes.

She released her grip on Shane as he parked the bike in front of the entrance to the hotel. This was it. She would never see him again—and that made her feel a serious pang of regret. He had been kind and hadn’t asked anything in return. She watched him climb off the bike as she lifted the helmet off over her head. Her hair got caught and fell across her face, blocking her view. His large hands gently brushed the strands back, until she could see his smile looking down at her.

“We’re here.”

“Yeah.” She looked behind him, not moving. “It looks nice.”

“Yeah.” He took the helmet from her, and set it down on the seat. “Let me walk you inside.”

She didn’t even have it in her to protest. She wanted to savor a last few lingering minutes with him because she didn’t want to be alone with her thoughts. If she were honest with herself, it was also because she found him sexy as hell and fascinating. A man who understood who he was and his place in this big crazy-ass world. What would it feel like to be made love to by a man like that? A man who knew where to touch, how to please, how to treat a woman?

It didn’t matter that she had told herself she couldn’t be thinking about Shane that way. It was a natural reaction to the night. To want to forget, to get lost in the embrace of a hot, muscular man. To pretend that her life hadn’t just been thoroughly shoved off course.

“Thanks.” She slipped her left leg over, trying not to flash him, but she likely didn’t entirely succeed given the way his eyes darted down to her inner thigh. She refused to be embarrassed. It was the only way to get off the bike. Resting her boots on the tire, she sat there for a second facing toward him, wondering what she should say. There really wasn’t a thank you adequate enough for someone stepping in when you were in potential danger and giving you a hand.

To her surprise, he cupped her cheeks. The tender touch made her heart ache. She had so much to give, and no one to give it to. That didn’t feel fair at all. His gaze darted down to her mouth and for a second she thought he was actually going to kiss her. When he didn’t, she felt like crying and hated herself for it. That’s why he shouldn’t kiss her, despite whatever desire his gaze created in her. She needed too much right now. More than a stranger on the streets of Nashville could provide.

“Such a pretty girl,” he murmured. “Ben is a fucking idiot.”

It wasn’t all that she wanted, but it was enough. She appreciated his words tremendously. “I can only agree with you on that.” Then she smiled at him, enjoying the perspective that came with almost being the same height as he was. “But let’s not talk about him anymore. It’s over and done and we both have better things to do.”

“Like what?” His thumb stroked over her bottom lip and his eyes darkened into inky pools.

She shivered and it wasn’t from cold. The night was still warm. It was the way he looked at her… Avery felt an ache everywhere. Not just the emotional one. But the physical one as well. She ached deep inside for the fulfillment Ben never could or never would give her. Her nipples were tight, painful buds begging for a man’s touch. That clenching in her belly drove her to distraction, made her want to throw caution far off into the wind, do things she’d never done.

It was that deep, driving desire that had her saying without any hesitation or reservation, “You can kiss me.”

The words were out before she could take them back. Not that she would.

If he was sympathetic but turned her down, she would feel rejected, but she would get over it. This wasn’t about him and what he thought. It was about her.

Shane didn’t say anything though. He just leaned in, narrowing the space between them inch by painful inch until his mouth hovered over hers. He smelled like cologne, but it was subtle. Mostly he smelled like the man he was, though she wasn’t entirely sure what she meant by that. Just that he crowded her space, filled it, encapsulated her, and he hadn’t even done anything. It was just his presence. He dominated by existing, and she thought it was sexy as hell. Exciting. His hands were still on her cheeks and, finally, after the longest moment of anticipation ever, he brushed his lips over hers.

She’d kissed a few boys before Ben, but not many and she should have felt nervous, but instead she embraced the change, the newness, the heady sensation that Shane was a grown man.

It was a sweet, kind kiss, not a questing one. It was soft, gentle.

It was nicer than it should be. Nicer than she wanted it to be.

“Girl, you’re as sweet as sugar and twice as sexy,” he murmured.

“More,” she told him. “Please.”

When she kissed him back, she wrapped her fingers around the small of his back and pulled his body closer to her so that his hips bumped against her thighs. She closed her eyes, dropped her head back, and opened her mouth for him in invitation. For a brief second, the kiss deepened, got just a little dirty as his tongue plunged in between her open lips and she was there for it, giving into the moment, to him, to a new and exciting future.

But then he suddenly pulled back.

“Avery.” His voice was husky, his fingers sliding back into her hair and pulling gently so her lips were out of his reach.

---