Page 30 of Her Cruel Bodyguard

“Welcome,” Mindy’s voice holds that softness I am praying to hell is somewhere in Jake.

For the longest of seconds, they both stand smiling at each other. “Sorry to impose on you like this, thanks for having us,” Eva says softly as well.

“It’s fine,” Mindy waves me off. “Jake doesn’t have school tomorrow, and he has not had dinner, or rather he won’t eat,” she rolls her eyes.

“Dad!” Jake hurtles down the stairs to us in pajama pants and a bright-colored T-shirt, and before I get the time to prepare and brace up for his suffocating but welcomed hug, he throws himself at me.

He is tall for his age and can wrap his legs around my waist and arms around my neck with a little leap.

“Hey,” I hold him to myself with one hand. Hopefully, he cannot hear my heart jamming against my chest or feel the tension snaking my spine.

“I will get the food,” Eva announces and fetches the packs of food out of the car with Mindy helping out.

“I miss you,” Jake mumbles into my neck. He smells like crayons and spilled ink.

“Jake, do you have ink on your hands again?” It’s most likely that I now have ink on my face and some part of my neck.

“Maybe,” he says and bursts into laughter.

Ahh, shit.

I walk with him clinging on me to the porch as Eva and Mindy set up the table. Fish tacos for Jake and myself. I loathe the food, but I don’t plan on eating, and mac and cheese for Mindy, and chips and shrimp for Eva.

“All set,” Mindy claps her hands and takes a seat.

“I want you to meet someone,” I set Jake down on a seat beside Eva as she settles down. “This is Eva, and Eva, this is Jake.”

“He has your eyes and her hair,” Eva smiles. “Hello, Jake,” she stretches out her hand for a handshake.

“You are beautiful,” Jake swoons, and thank goodness he is so young.

“And so are you,” Eva ruffles his hair. “Nice to meet you.”

“Are you my dad’s girlfriend?” Jake whispers. Well, that’s what he thinks because he is loud enough for everyone to hear.

Eva cups her mouth in mock-whisper, “I might be. Would that be a bad thing?”

“How did he get you?” Jake leans into the conversation.

“I wonder too, every single day,” Eva laughs softly but Jake’s laughter is a bursting shriek. He seems taken by her. Bright hopeful eyes staring at her like she is some divinity.

Eva and Jake continue to mumble about things, ranging from school to hobbies. Jake even dares to ask her on a date before me, and she accepts. He wants to go on a candy date, and Eva gladly said yes. They even have something in common: art. He loves to draw, and she loves to capture things.

I excuse myself to remove myself from the situation.

I feel like I am suffocating, and I want to attribute that feeling to the fact that Eva is here with Jake and they are getting along, which jeopardizes my plan. But I also know I am wrong. I always get this feeling when I am around Jake.

He makes it easy to be his father, but I still cannot shake the worry off. I never had a good father figure to look up to, and I fear I am already not worthy of being looked up to. I will never abuse him or anyone for that matter, but it goes beyond that.

I am damaged.

Jake shines a blinding light on the damaged part of me every time I watch him in his purity, laughing, drawing, and just living like he has no care in the world. I never had that life. I never knew that life. And it scares me to my bones that if I get as close to him as he wants, I will ruin that life for him.

“I need…” I clamp my lips as clean air almost slips. “I need to make a call,” I pick a lie and stand. “Eat up,” I snap my fingers at Jake, who is more interested in playing a hand game with Eva than in his food.

It appears that father and son are smitten by the same woman.

I strut down the stairs, pretending to pull my phone out of my pants pocket. I keep walking, plastering the phone to my ear as I go to the back of the car, grateful that the night air is chilly, washing away some of my tension.

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