Page 46 of Yours Temporarily

“You have my number,” I mention, completely off topic. My mind isn’t in the game. Stay cool, buddy. You can do this. I stick to the phone sentence I was trying to say. “Call me if you—”

“Get nightmares?” Zuri says playfully as she bites her lower lip, and I struggle to look at her without thinking of how those lips taste. “With the mountains and all, a mountain lion or bear could be chasing me down.”

I laugh, though it’s strained. My glance inadvertently seeks out Gavin as discomfort over their intimacy tightens my gut and heats my skin. It’s not just their affection that unsettles me—it’s the growing realization of my desire for Zuri. The longing is becoming increasingly hard to ignore. I take a step backward, and I hit the closed door. But at least, the slight distance keeps me from reaching for Zuri and kissing her senseless right in front of my brother and his fiancée.

“Breakfast.” My mouth feels dry, and my gaze catches. “We’ll eat together. Gavin and I.” What’s with me? I’m struggling to piece my thoughts into coherent sentences. “We’ll pick you up.”

Restless, I rub the back of my neck, an attempt to distract my hands. Memories of our kiss flicker through my mind, haunting yet precious. The ease with which I could kiss her again battles with my resolve not to toy with her. That kiss was real, filled with our raw emotions.

But before I dare kiss her again, it’s crucial that Zuri grasps the depth of my feelings. So how do I reveal my true feelings and risk investing in us?

CHAPTER 17

Jeremy

Gavin’s house is nestled close to Pleasant View Trail, so we hit it early. As we jog, I breathe in the freshness as opposed to San Francisco’s urban rush. Remnants of snow linger on the distant mountains, inviting me to ski soon. But here, the scent of pine and damp earth signals spring in full swing.

Gavin, keeping pace beside me, talks about his honeymoon plans. “Hope wanted to go to Niagara Falls, and I’m looking forward to it.” His steady voice sends humid puffs into the cool morning air. Despite our vigorous pace, the calmness about him surprises me, given the upheaval he experienced nearly two years ago when he was left standing at the altar.

“So, how are you feeling about the wedding?” I speak not only as the best man but also as his brother concerned for his well-being.

Gavin pauses, then stretches, and a muscle pops in his shoulder.

“I was nervous a month ago. I overlooked so many red flags with Lucky, but Hope hasn’t given me any reason to doubt her love for me.”

A critter darts across the trail too fast for me to discern if it was a squirrel or a gopher.

“These last two weeks, I’ve had peace about it. Hope and I are starting our marriage with God being our foundation. That’s a big deal. She suggested we approach the ceremony differently to ease my nerves.”

He continues, reflecting on the challenges of their families’ acceptance and their journey together. “Hope’s been incredible throughout, even with her family’s hesitance. Her dad couldn’t make the trip due to health reasons, and Mom… Well, she’s coming around.”

I hardly believe him, but I won’t voice my doubts.

He resumes a slow jog, and I fall in step.

Colorado’s serene beauty surrounds us, our shoes pummeling wet leaves from last fall. The aspens stand tall and leafless, but in two months, they’ll be flourishing and blending in with the evergreens.

The trail curves, and we slow to navigate the bend. The morning sun peeks through the canopy, dappling the ground with patches of light.

“What about you?” Gavin veers into my personal territory. “You seemed at ease with Zuri last night.”

“She’s… easy to be around.” I speak between breaths. “We respect each other, and she values my opinions.” The memory of her trusting me to choose the café furniture warms me anew, even as my feet pound the winding trail. “We laugh at each other’s jokes.”

“But is there more? Beyond the arrangement?” Gavin digs deeper, his question slicing through the morning’s tranquility.

“It’s complicated.” Because of my back and forth. But it shouldn’t be. Zuri is nothing like Sonya. “There might be something more.”

“I’d say don’t wait too long.” He jogs past me when the trail’s muddy edges make us run single-file. “Getting right back at it helps you not get too comfortable in your single life. Emotions have a way of sneaking up on you when you least expect it.”

I’m well past “getting right back at it” —Sonya left me four years ago. Yet, there’s Gavin, not only way ahead of me on the trail but also blazing a trail in this thing called love. His advice, born from experience, resonates deeply. I’ve seen him navigate his share of emotional turmoil. Now, his journey to finding happiness with Hope is a testimony to the unexpected paths the heart can take.

If only he knew my emotional turmoil since Zuri came into my life! I’ve enjoyed having her in my life more than I’d expected. As we navigate the trail’s curves, Gavin’s advice not to wait too long echoes in my mind. I don’t want to go back to my life without Zuri in it.

We continue our run, the conversation shifting to lighter topics, the early morning exertion a backdrop to our brotherly bond. Birds chirp overhead while our footsteps rhythmically pound the earth beneath us. Both create a meditative soundtrack to the quiet morning.

Near the end of our trail, the physical exertion rejuvenates me, as does the clarity of mind that comes after a workout. Then Gavin slows, signaling the end of our run, and we come to a stop, our breaths heavy, the cool air a contrast to the warmth emanating from my body. We stretch in silence, a necessary conclusion to each run, yet my mind is far from silent. It’s still grappling with my burgeoning feelings.

“We’d better not let our ladies wait too long for their breakfast.” Gavin grins.

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