“I want us to make choices together. When it comes to Dante, I want us to be equals.” It’s a longshot, I know, but I can’t help but ask.
Mikhail sits next to me on the bed. The mattress sinks under his weight and I shift towards him without meaning to. Our thighs brush and electricity sizzles under my skin.
Down, girl. That is not why we’re here.
Mikhail seems perfectly in control of himself, which just fucking figures. “I don’t do ‘equals.’ I don’t think I’ve ever seen it done before. Not in the Bratva.”
“Me either. My parents weren’t equals. At all,” I admit. “Every decision my mom ever made was wrong, according to my father. He yelled at her for every little thing. Even things she couldn’t control.”
“Like?”
Mikhail doesn’t deserve any explanations from me, but I can’t stop myself. There’s so much I can’t tell him. But I can share this.
“Attention from other men. She was beautiful and men paid attention to her. She couldn’t help it.”
“You must look like her,” Mikhail murmurs, almost softly enough I don’t hear it.
I pretend I don’t and keep going. “My father hated it and he’d scream until she was crying on the floor. I think he was worried she’d see how many options she had and leave him. I still think she would have if she hadn’t died.”
“How did it happen?”
“Heart attack.” The rest of the story sits on the tip of my tongue. I almost swallow it down, the way I have most of my life. But this time, I let it fly. “Supposedly. If you ask me, my father poisoned her.”
“And you still let him marry you off to Trofim.”
I turn to him. “You know I didn’t have a choice.”
Our eyes meet and hold. Something passes between us that makes my heart race and my stomach flip. “I know enough about you to know you can be very persuasive. You have a way of getting what you want—a way of changing people’s minds.”
He has no idea exactly how far I’ve gone to get what I want. If I’m lucky, he never will.
“Have I changed yours?”
He turns away and drags a hand through his golden brown hair. It sticks up and he looks so much like Dante it hurts. “We can try.”
“Equals?” I gasp.
He shrugs, a loose agreement. “The reason I went into your bridal suite that night is because I was tired of things being done the way they have always been done. I wanted to make changes, make this world better. Why not give this change a try?”
Because you’re supposed to be a cold, heartless bastard. You’re supposed to push me away and make me hate you.
My head spins and I physically need to lie down. I curl onto my side, tucking my pillow under my cheek. “Today has been too much for me. I need to sleep.”
I close my eyes and when I feel Mikhail stand up, I assume he’s leaving.
Then his weight shifts onto the mattress behind me.
“What are you doing?” I snap, rolling over. Exhaustion has left the building. Now, my heart is hammering against my chest.
Mikhail lies down next to me, his strong arms wrapped around a pillow. “You said you wanted to sleep.”
“That doesn’t explain what you’re doing here.”
In a blink, his arm is around my waist. He tugs me towards him, smothering me in the delicious warmth of his body. “I’ve heard you having nightmares every single night since you moved in,” he says quietly in my hair. “It’s distracting. And it can’t be good for you. When’s the last time you woke up rested?”
The night he carried me to his bed. The night I fell asleep with his body wrapped around mine.
My throat is sore and my muscles ache. I need a good night’s sleep. That’s the only reason I sigh and sag against his chest. “The way you smell should count as chemical warfare. No one could resist this.”