Page 61 of Where the River Meets the Skye

It was three days later when they tried again. River clung to Skye as his husband moved inside him, feeling the warmth of Skye’s skin against his, inhaling his scent, his fingers gripping Skye’s hair as he soaked up the pleasure, the connection, the oneness of their bodies coming together, tears sliding down his cheeks, because with every thrust, every kiss, every orgasm, from Skye, he felt loved, safe, and cherished. Skye was his home, his heart, his breath, and he never thought they would be here, that what had once been used as an act of cruelty, to break him, destroy him, was now being used to make him whole again. He’d never thought that having sex with the right person could help him heal, that being with Skye could mend the shattered pieces of his soul and turn them into something beautiful. He was healing a little more, every single day, because of Skye.

They came together, moaning each other’s names. Skye inside of River, with River’s legs wrapped around him, and River in Skye’s hand.

River held Skye, his husband collapsed on top of him, both of them sated, and crying tears of joy, their bodies soaked in sweat, and as he stroked his fingers through Skye’s hair with one hand and along his bare side with the other, he smiled warmly and sent up a silent prayer, thanking God for Skye, and for marriage, and for the beautiful gift of sex, and that he finally knew what it was like to be one, in every sense of the word, with the person he loved most in all the world.

CHAPTER 28

Skye

3 MONTHS LATER

“Hey, can I join you?” River asked, sitting next to Skye on the sofa, both of them with reading materials in their hands. This had become a regular routine for them, spending time during the weekends or evenings reading together, sometimes to themselves and sometimes to each other.

Skye smiled and lifted his arms so that River could lay down and rest his head on his lap.

“What’s that one about?” Skye asked as he stroked his fingers through River’s hair, gazing down at him. He had another National Geographic magazine in his hands. He was such a dork.

“Secrets of Whales?” Skye said with a grin, when River turned the cover so Skye could read it. “You’re adorable, you know that?” He leaned down and pressed his lips to his husband’s.

River smiled through the kiss and gripped the back of Skye’s neck, kissing him back.

They read for a while, Skye stroking his fingers through River’s hair, before River set his magazine aside and stood.

But he was sitting back down in an instant, his hand over his heart.

“River?” Skye said, when he noticed the glazed look in his husband’s eyes, and his face growing pale.

“Shit,” River said, closing his eyes. He rested back against the sofa, seeming to gather himself.

“Riv?” Skye said again, his heart racing now. “What’s wrong?” He rested his hand on River’s arm. His husband looked exhausted from having been on his feet for less than three seconds.

“It was my heart, Skye,” River said finally, eyes still closed, his hand resting on his chest.

“What?” Skye said in surprise. “I thought that was better. I thought the medicine was working. You haven’t had an episode in months.”

River opened his eyes now and bit his lip, glancing at his husband.

Skye narrowed his eyes. “River,” he said, his tone dripping with accusation. “You haven’t had an episode in months, right?”

River glanced away. “They, uh…they started up again, a few weeks ago,” he admitted.

“What?” Skye almost shouted. He couldn’t remember a time when he’d ever been more upset with River. “Are you kidding me?! This has been going on for weeks, and you didn’t think to tell me? What the hell, Riv?” There was more anger behind his words than he’d intended but he couldn’t help it. “Were you ever planning on telling me or were you going to just pass out on me one day, or let me get a phone call telling me you were in the hospital again and that’s how I was going to find out?” His jaw was clenched when he stopped speaking and River’s eyes were wide.

“I’m sorry, Skye,” he said. “I didn’t want to worry you…”

That just made Skye angrier. “Didn’t…” he clenched his jaw to keep from losing it on River again, standing up and running his fingers through his hair. He took a deep breath and let it out. “Damn it, River,” he said, finally, looking back at his husband, his voice calmer but still stern. “What do you think I’m doing now? You can’t keep this kind of stuff from me. I need to know if you’ve got something going on, especially when it has to do with your heart.”

“I guess…I guess I was hoping it would go away again on its own, and…I wouldn’t have to say anything. And I think I thought that maybe telling you, somehow would make it more real. And maybe ignoring it would make it easier to handle. And I’m frustrated that it’s happening again, Skye. Things have been going so well. Our sex life has been amazing, and my health has been good, aside from my tailbone and hip pain, but I’m living with it. I just didn’t want to accept that we had one more thing to deal with. I didn’t want you to be burdened with one more problem.”

Skye sighed. “I get that, River. I do. But this is a big deal. And I’m your husband. I want to know when you aren’t well. That’s what marriage is. We take care of each other, and carry each other’s burdens.”

River’s eyes blazed. “God, Skye, it’s not that easy!” He almost shouted, but there were tears stinging at the corners of his eyes too. “Especially when I’m the one in the relationship with all the problems. I’m the one with the mental health issues and the physical health issues, and what do I carry for you, or even with you? Nothing, because your life wasn’t a hell hole before we met.” Tears slid down his cheeks now. “It’s not like I have a burden, for fuck’s sake. I am the goddamn burden! And I’m tired of it! I just want to be normal. Healthy. I want to be okay, and not have you worrying about me, or taking care of me all the time. I just…” He growled and grabbed a pillow off the couch before throwing it across the room, hard and then stood up from the couch and walked into the bedroom, slamming the door shut behind him, making Skye flinch.

Skye ran his fingers through his hair and sat back down on the couch, letting out a heavy sigh. Three months. They’d had three months of relative normalcy. River had had some headaches but no full blown migraines, thanks to the medication he was on. His tailbone still bothered him and he still carried his seat cushion everywhere he went. They couldn’t travel far but they’d managed a week long trip out to a state park nearby. They’d rented an RV so that they’d be more comfortable, and enjoyed fishing, swimming, sitting out by the campfire, stargazing, and just relaxing and getting away from it all. And it had been wonderful.

The best part was that despite the issues with River’s tailbone he was still able to enjoy anal sex. He was sore afterwards but he said it was worth it, and he did stretches and iced if necessary, or had Skye massage his glutes which seemed to help.

River’s flashbacks had been less and less frequent, his nightmares had been almost nonexistent, and he was right. Their sex life had been pretty great. Things had been good over the last few months. And now to have this staring them in the face again. No wonder River hadn’t wanted to tell him. They’d had so little reprieve and he wasn’t ready to say goodbye to it. He couldn’t face that things were going downhill again so soon.

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