Page 69 of Fierce Monarch

When I was dry, I changed into one of Grey’s shirts, needing the extra comfort to get through the night, and finished getting ready for bed. The murmured conversation by the door was still happening, but I ignored it. That wasn’t for me.

Dropping my phone on the bedside table, I cringed when it buzzed loudly. I was in no way ready to face the world, but I flipped it over with a sigh anyway. My job meant I didn’t get a break, even when I needed one. Still, nothing could’ve prepared me for the name on the text.

Nate.

Stay home for a while. Cash is gunning for you.

For the longest time, I just stared at it. The wounds he’d left were open and raw, and I wanted to drag him through them with me. If I hurt, he should hurt. But I also knew I wasn’t ready to open that part of me up to him again. That vulnerable section of me was locked away, where it needed to be.

In the end, I didn’t respond because it wasn’t like it was new information. Cash had been gunning for me for months, and he wouldn’t stop until one of us was dead. I knew that, he knew that, the entire fucking city knew that, and they were placing bets on the victor.

Grey finally shut the door, turned out the lights, and curled up in bed, saying nothing as he wrapped himself around me. It felt like he was trying to imitate Dominic’s actions in the gym, but I didn’t need a weighted blanket; I just needed him.

My Greyson. My heart.

My most trusted friend.

That something in my stomach pushed me again. Do it.

“I love you,” I said quietly as I let my eyes adjust to the darkness.

“I love you too, reina. I’m sorry about today.”

“You’re always having to apologize for the others. Doesn’t it get frustrating?”

He hummed, the sound vibrating against my body. “Maybe, but it’s not about them in the end. It’s about you. I want you to know that you’re safe with me, that I’ll take care of you, even when I’m not the one who’s broken something.”

How did he know exactly what to say to my fragile, bruised soul? I knew the uncertainty wasn’t forever, that I’d probably find a way to forgive Dominic again, but for now, it felt impossible to regain our footing. I was too thick in the pain to see past that, but one thing was becoming perfectly clear.

“I think you’re the only one I trust.” Snuggling deeper into his embrace, I realized this was the place I felt the most at home. That was the thought that struck the match.

Grey had always been there for me. When we were kids, he was the one who held me when I needed it, who picked me up when I fell, who kissed my boo-boos and wiped my tears. As adults, he was my shadow, the other half of my brain, my everything.

I didn’t want to live without him for a second.

“Baby.” He pulled closer, trying to squeeze his love into me with actions instead of words, but he didn’t need to. I knew he loved me. He showed me every fucking day, even when I didn’t deserve it.

Now, it was my turn to show him something.

“I’m serious. Dominic has already proven he’ll keep things from me to get what he wants and—” I cut myself off before I talked about Nate. I couldn’t talk about him right now. Not when I wasn’t sure what was happening. “This isn’t about them, though. It’s about you. You’ve always been there for me, even when I didn’t deserve you. I don’t want to lose you.”

“You’ve always deserved me, reina. I’m not going anywhere. Not unless you’re with me.” He said it so fiercely that I felt it in my chest, but he didn’t understand.

That need in my stomach was growing with every second and had been for days, weeks, months. Years, if I was honest. Maybe I’d spent my whole life with it coiling and writhing in my belly. All I knew was, it was time to do something about it. Time to claim what was mine.

Do it.

I twisted, lifting my head so that we were facing each other. His brows furrowed, and he ran his fingers over my cheeks gently, soothing me. But I didn’t want to be soothed. I had to do something. It was time. “I’m serious, Greyson. I can’t lose you. Not now, not ever. I can’t survive without you.”

“Mari, I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know that. I do, I just want to make it official.”

“Official?”

I pulled him closer, wrapping myself around him this time. Giving him every piece of me that I could. I didn’t want Greyson every day; I wanted him always. When I tipped my head back to see his face, Grey wrapped his hand in my hair, supporting my neck so I didn’t hurt myself. It was so simple, so full of love, that I smiled. It was just one more example of how in tune we were.

I never wanted it to end.

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